[armygirl]

Hi April.

Months back, I met a man who I really hit it off with, but he is in the military and stationed 1000 miles from me. At first, we casually talked but we realized we had feelings for the other. Then, a few months ago we decided to start a relationship despite the distance. We fell in love with one another, and everything went great. Regardless of all the miles apart, we both were satisfied with our relationship and we were very close.

He would call, Skype, and text me often and always said “I love you” and made me feel so important. Then, these past few weeks, he has been working extra long hours, which meant that we weren’t able to talk as much. I was understanding of that and respected his schedule. Then, all of a sudden, he started to show less emotion and attention to me even on weekends. As a result of this, I began lashing out a bit because I felt frustrated. I kept asking him if something deeper was wrong, and he told me no but it sure seemed that way.

Now, we barely communicate at all. He says that he’s tired of my neediness and arguments with him and has rethought everything. He says he still wants to be with me but doesn’t know if now is the right time. What should I do at this point? Should I give him space or what? Thanks!

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Learn from your mistakes. 😉 If you’re not getting enough attention, lashing out at him is the last thing you should do. Making yourself more enticing, is the first. 😎 There is nothing wrong with him, as your post title indicates. He did what any guy would do — distance himself, and question the relationship with a girlfriend who is needy and lashing out. These aren’t qualities that will advance a romantic relationship with anyone. 😳

If you want to change your behavior with him, and back off, but when he does ask you out on a date or connect with you, be the kind of woman he wants, you may be able to do damage control — but it depends on the extent of damage done, that now needs to be controlled.

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