[michaelmarst]

Two years ago my wife and i (we are both now 28) were at a friends party when we met a guy who we got on well with and he became a friend of mine. I knew he was a well paid photograher but it was only several weeks later that he told me he did nude photoshoots for erotic magazines, not particularily porn mags but he classed the shoots as tasteful erotica.

He propostioned to my wife to consider being in one of his shoots, and she laughed it off at first but he told her he was serious. She gave it some thought and agreed to do one shoot for a magazine he did regular work for, which i was amazed she would agree to do it but she said it would be something to look back on in years to come.

Well from that first photoshoot she has changed a lot. She told me she had loved it and wanted to do more, and he told her she had a great body and look and he could get her some work.

In 2010 she told me she was having breast implants, which is something she had said in the past did not interest her, and i was shocked at the size she went up to. The photographer friend then suggested he became her agent because of his connections and she accepted his proposal, and the friendship that had been there pre boob job disapeared and i never heard from him and he told me because he was now my wife’s agent he didnt want a personal friendship anymore.

Since the breast implants she is just another person completely, her ‘agent’ parades her around at parties and buys her and chooses the clothes she wears for them, and the photoshoots have become increasingly more erotic in taste..

I just don’t know where all this is leading April. She quit her day job to do the modelling earlier this year and is away this week doing a shoot, her agent is there with her, but i text him prior to them leaving and told him i was concerned but he bluntly told me that he had big plans for her.

I need some advice April.

[Ask April Masini]

I’m not sure if you’re the same person as [b]stevew[/b] or just someone who has a remarkably similar story, but here’s the advice I gave him [url]http://www.askapril.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=163967&p=174333#p174333[/url]. I’ve gotten similar stories posted here, and they all end the same way — with the wife leaving the husband after some nude modeling became a “gateway drug” for a different lifestyle — and a different romantic and sexual partner than the husband. Boudoir photographs as a gift for you and only you are a lot different than getting into the soft core porn industry — by a long shot! 😳

The problem is between you and your wife. It really sounds like she’s on her way out of the relationship. I’m sorry — but there’s not a lot you can do except tell her what you want from her and the relationship and figure out where your lines in the sand are. A committed couple respects each other’s boundaries and values. If she doesn’t, then you’ve learned too late who she really is. If she’s crossed your lines in the sand, then the relationship will end. How it ends is up to you. 😳

I hope this helps. Let me know how things go.

Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[michaelmarst]

Hi April,

I was avoiding dealing with my wife all week, burying my head in the sand hoping she will change back to the person she was. But i did speak to her yesterday about all of my concerns and worries about her. Initially she laughed them off and told me to speak to my ex friend, her agent, about her career, which was a ludicrous statement from her considering we are meant to be husband and wife.

I asked her why she was acting differently with me nowaday’s, was it to do with him and did she have feelings for him, and she told me she was sorry but she liked him and they had grown a lot closer but it was since she had got more attention from modelling from men and she couldnt remain married to me anymore.

[Ask April Masini]

My advice is to accept that she’s leaving the marriage and get yourself a divorce. The sooner it’s over, the sooner you can move on with your life without her.

I’m sorry for your pain — don’t prolong it. 😳

Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[NeilPearson]

I agree… cut your losses and get out quick. You don’t need that kind of relationship in your life

[Ask April Masini]

Happy New Year! Let me know how things are going for you. 😉

[Ethan Morales]

The husband’s story is fundamentally about a relationship losing balance emotionally, sexually, and in terms of power. His wife’s experience with nude modelling seems to have triggered a deep personal transformation, one that shifted her identity and priorities. For her, the modelling may represent empowerment, self-expression, or validation but for him, it represents loss, betrayal, and fear of where it’s leading.

April’s point about “boudoir photos for you and only you” versus “soft-core erotica for an audience” is key. One is an intimate act within a relationship, a form of trust and connection. The other changes the dynamic completely, making her body and sexuality part of her public persona. That’s a massive shift that many relationships simply can’t survive unless both people have the same values about boundaries, privacy, and fidelity (emotional or otherwise).

She also highlights something very insightful that this type of modelling can become a “gateway drug” to a new lifestyle. It doesn’t mean it has to, but in many cases it does, because the environment constant validation, exposure to new people, and sexual attention can fundamentally alter how someone views themselves and their partner. If her “agent” is now controlling her image, wardrobe, and professional life, it’s no longer about art or empowerment; it’s about control and objectification, ironically from someone other than her husband.

From the husband’s side, he’s struggling with helplessness. He watched the change happen step by step each small decision (first shoot, implants, new agent, quitting her job) and probably hoped it was just a phase. But April’s right: by the time someone’s values and desires have shifted that far, the relationship has already transformed into something unrecognisable.

[PassionSeeker]

Your wife’s modeling career has clearly transformed her emotionally, sexually, and in how she views herself. What began as a single “tasteful” photoshoot has evolved into a new identity and lifestyle that no longer aligns with your marriage. Each step the implants, quitting her job, allowing her agent to take control shows she’s moved further from the woman you knew and closer to someone living for external validation.

April was right: this kind of modeling often becomes a “gateway” to a different life, and your wife has crossed that line. Her agent’s growing influence over her appearance, career, and choices only deepens your loss of connection and control. The truth is, her priorities have changed — and she’s told you as much.

You can’t pull her back into the marriage she’s already emotionally left. The healthiest thing you can do is accept that she’s gone, protect your emotional wellbeing, and begin to rebuild your life. Staying will only prolong your pain. It’s time to let go, heal, and create space for a relationship where respect and loyalty still exist.

[Marcus king]

Alright I’m going to speak to you straight, because this situation is already past the point of gentle advice.

Here’s the truth you’re afraid to say out loud:

Your wife didn’t just get a new job.
She entered a new world one built on attention, validation, ego, and being desired.
And the man who used to be just a friend has become her handler emotionally, socially, and possibly financially.

And you?
You’ve been phased out.

Not because she hates you.
But because she’s being rewired.

[Val Unfiltered💋]

oh babe… she didn’t just get a new agent, she got a whole new main character edit. 😮‍💨 like, he’s not managing her, he’s molding her. and you’re standing there watching your wife turn into his portfolio piece. you can’t compete with someone selling her a fantasy but you can remind her who she was before the flashbulbs. 💔

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