The thing is though, that my boyfriend IS happy. I decided to be straight up with him and tell him how I feel in the relationship sometimes, it caused him to become severely depressed for several days. We really opened up and talked things out. But he still loves me so much and says he can’t imagine himself being with anyone else.
Of course, that same night he got drunk again and told me he was getting me a new $2,000 macbook for my birthday, and told me how badly he needs me and just generally made me feel so bad that I cried all night. He said things like, he always thought it was me and him against everything, now it’s him vs me vs everything… and, he thought I would always be there for him, and we were building our life together and he always thought he would have a place in mine. But then he says he never means what he says when he’s drunk but he’s also a really good liar.
He’s been better and a lot nicer lately, but I still can’t shake these feelings of sadness and doubt. One minute I think I can leave him, the next I remember the little things that make me smile and how happy I can be with him. I know he doesn’t want to lose me, but I am still unsure…
