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MarkFriser
Member #156,465Well we went for a coffee today, after class, and she’s coming to my place for dinner Friday night.
But she asked is it “just dinner”? I asked why is she so scared, and then she said some friendship stuff again.Sigh…. ?
😕 Member #156,465A little update,
She canceled the date (as I thought she would) saying that they had classes on Saturday and that we will have to go another time, cause she cant make it this time. Well i checked that info (I have a friend that goes to the same class) and it is all true. But, I kinda thought that if you care you would spare some time. My girl friend told me that she is maybe playing hard to get and that I should contact her. She doesn’t look to me like she is that type of girl (but what do i know..) and i thought maybe its her time to call out, or is it? Tomorrow we have class for the last time this year.
Should I quit?
If you ask yourself why i care much about this, She is one of the rare girls i found attractive in all ways.Member #156,465Well, I though that also, but firstly, she had boyfriends before. Secondly she is scared of sex and i dont think she got bored of it so quickly she didnt even want to explore in that area. Then, she had long term relationships before, and last, if she wanted to be out of the relationship why is she now in a new one -_- Maybe its hard for me to accept it, but still, somehow i dont agree with that, cause we werent even close to the “bored phase”, and why the 1month drama then?
Member #156,465Correction: “I dont think she is faking” :/ Member #156,465Sorry for the spam, but since the last post, its bugging me that there are some things i did not say. Pretty much the thing that is troubling me most, what happens/happened when I’m not around. You see, 1 week before the brake up: whenever she told me she loves me she did it with a tone, in which i was never sure if its true. But the week before the brakeup she just stopped me in the apartment looked me in the eyes and said (with dead serious voice). “I must be the happiest girl in the world to have someone like you by my side, you are the best boyfriend there can be,I love you so much please dont ever leave me ” (I’m pretty good at “reading” people, so I think that love did blind me that much, that i wouldnt realise if this was fake, maybe it was… ). And in the next 5 days our seeing cut of for 50% (she had an excuse that she has studying to do with her friends, later she admited they had fun, but i told her times before that i love when she is having fun and that there is no reason to make some stupid excuses), and she was sounding pretty cold, altough, we met again 3 times that week, and she was normal, loving, she cryed about stuff that saturaday… So i didnt suspect nothing (as i beleive that all was okay). 2 days later she broke up with me (she was crying like hell, as she didnt want to do it, like someone has forced her). So we broke up (i was a bit angry at that time, so i didnt stop her in doing it ,altough i tried, i think that might made her mad). The reason she left me was firstly: “the relationship has gotten cold” (btw. in all time relationship was best that week, so I dont understand). I told her if thats true why are u crying then, then she told me that she doesnt know, and she didnt got cold but she doesnt know what to say to me… After 2 weeks she told me that “I left her” i was so confused, and the best thing she really meant it. Second reason she left me was, she said: That there is so much fun in the dormatory (where she is, sleeps at my place) and she is missing it out all because of our relationship, she wanted too cut of the our seeing but i said no…. (there actually isnt any fun, i investigated, but i know she is insecure so she loves when there is a lot of people around, and another thing her mother didnt let her go out at all in our home city). 2 weeks later (1month total), that time when we got back together she admitted that it is not me that is guilty, its her mothers influence and herself, and that its all ok, and that she had time for everything. Well the rest Ive already told you…
So, the thing is, what happens when she is not with me, why does she change? Her stupid friends told her that she changed in a positive way since she left me (which is so untrue she became a real bitch now). Was she happy with our relationship? Yes, she was and there wasnt a single day we didnt see/call each other. So I’m confused, Ive read alot of forum posts and I dont know what to think anymore. (btw. first day on her rebound she told my best friend, that she has zero feelings for me and that she is great now, but as soon as he mentioned something about me she got all nervous again, on the other hand she knows he is going to tell me that, maybe she wanted to make me jelaous or something? i have a feeling she has too much pride to make ‘The call’).
The thing she repeated the most is That “she doesnt know what she wants” or “i will leave her for sure but her friends never will. (btw. i think her friends always had a priority over me). Next day, i dont want to hurt you again. When I add up all of these i really do not know what to think. There are some reason for which i dont think she isnt faking it all (sex, yes, i was the first guy she had sex with and i know how shy she was, she never tried self-pleaseing her…so when i gave her, her first org**sm she was totaly scared and shocked).
What do u think now out of this situation? I even had facebook access, and saw her telling her friends that she feels some special connection to me (not during the brakeup ofcourse). Do u still think she will come to her senses in the next 2 months?Member #156,465Wow, thank you alot, that was a really fast reply ! I will let you know how things are going
🙂 Just to answer your questions:
1) I’m 20.2) What i want and her mental state? Here is what the thing is, this summer her mom decided to tell her what really happened to her dad (who is dead); he killed himself, and i know that she feels betrayed and insecure. But it was a no problem for me (at least most of the time). I am very secure altough im only 20, I have alot od psychological knowledge… Week before we broke up i actually started to help her, i told her that i would talk to her mom and be there for her always (i told her if your mom gets angry i will get a job and support you myself).
The more we are together the better person she becomes, she is hanging out with, pardon me, idiots. Her girlfriends tell stuff like “you dont need him”, “what love, you are 20″. So she lived 2 weeks with me, she stopped smoking, i never got so much love from her, she stopped crying she was happy 0-24. ” After her friends came back i dont know WTH happend to her, she was not the same person anymore… So i hopped that we will spend this summer together so i can show her that i indeed, will be there for her, always… -
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