[hmszuch]

Hello….Again
So we had a phone conversation thursday evening, when she called me. She wanted to talk…so I said sure. She went into how she was sorry for not responding and she was sorry that she hurt me. I said I wasn’t mad, and its ok I understand that you’re busy…and you didn’t hurt me I was just worried for you. She said she just needed some time alone and didn’t really talk to anyone during that time. The rest of the call went very well…she kept saying she misses me and that she wished I could come hold her. We laughed, joked, and flirted…and I asked her if she wanted to go out to dinner this weekend and she said she would love that. That was Thursday. Friday she texted me from work, just a friendly text asking how my day was going. I repplied, short and sweet. We didn’t talk Friday night, I tried to contact her but nothing. Saturday morning she sent me a text saying her phone won’t let her make or receive calls but she can still text, and that her grandpa had to go to the hospital so she was there for a while and went home and went to bed. Then she says she has a family reunion and she can’t do dinner….which would’ve been nice to know when I asked because she said she had nothing planned for the weekend. But I said that’s fine, go enjoy the reunion and we’ll just play it by ear. She then said “we can do something tomorrow though”, so I said that would be nice and she would text me in the morning . She then sent me a text this morning that said “need to see my dad today is his birthday and I forgot”. I said that’s ok, family comes first….but I honestly am a little upset and feel like I’m being played like a puppet. I don’t plan anything for the days that we’re “supposed” to see eachother because I plan on seeing her, but then something comes up and I lose other opportunities to do things with friends….such as going out on the boat to go fishing or go play golf…which I had to pass up because we had made plans together. I just feel like its kind of disrespectful….that I make plans and blow other people off to go see her, but then something comes up and her texts are very short with no “im sorry” or anything…just a text saying she has to do something else. I don’t know….am I acting irrational at all by being upset about this? I mean, I had chances to have an awesome weekend, and I understand if things come up but damn…it would’ve been nice to know beforehand so I could’ve had a chance to do other activities with friends but by the time I find out whats going on, its too late to do what I wanted or what I was invited to do. Should I just not contact her at all right now? I feel like everytime I do, something ALWAYS comes up, even when she states over and over that she doesn’t have any plans. I’m not going to keep hanging around for an answer, and I don’t know if I should be upfront with her and tell her how I feel or just forget about it? I have to go to mobile tomorrow, where she lives, for a meeting, and she said on the phone conversation that I should surprise her one day at work on her lunch break. She told me where she works and it would make her day if I showed up one afternoon…multiple times she told me this. And I was planning on possibly surprising her at work tomorrow and take her to lunch….but I don’t know if I still should now? I’m lost….am I wrong to be a little upset about this? It just seems like there’s always an excuse…phone wont answer, hospital visit, family reunion, dads birthday…obviously you can’t control a hospital visit or phone difficulties, but I would think that a family reunion and a birthday would be something that you wouldn’t forget about. Honestly, if she texted or called me right now I don’t think I would respond. I like her, I really do, but what the heck is going on? I have no idea….any thoughts about this at all?

Thanks again April

[hmszuch]

I’ve re-read what you wrote multiple times, and I understand. I will take your advice, and quit creating drama when there really is none….and you’re exactly right, I was afraid of rejection but I need to take that as a positive instead of a negative. I did ask her on a dinner date, and we’re going out this Saturday. I’m not even going to think about it, instead I’m going to focus on the goal…a possible relationship 😀 Thank you for all of your input, I can’t tell you how much it’s opened up my eyes to the way I’ve been acting….guess I needed a good smack in the face to wake up 😆

[hmszuch]

Hello again,
So I wanted to give you an update on what’s gone on since the last post. I took your advice and gave her a call…no answer so I left a short voicemail just asking her to call me whenever she got a chance. That was Wednesday evening. I got no call or text all day…until this evening…Thursday. All of the sudden, out of the blue, after days of no response, I get a text that reads “I miss you like crazy” then another right after “A lot 🙁“. I was busy so I didn’t respond…but then the phone rings about 30 min later and I didn’t know what to do…so I took the call. I asked how she was feeling….not quite sure knowing how to go about it. I asked what happened? She said “I’m sorry…I’ve been really busy”…and I get it…but why I would not get a response for days still puzzles me. I wasn’t rude, and I didn’t want to immediately jump into the “why didn’t you text or call me back” deal….so we just talked for a few min, and we’re going on a date Saturday. Here’s my dillema…I obviously want to know what had gone on, I think any guy would, and I think thats understandable…but do I even bring up the subject? Or do I act like nothing happened and just go along? If I do bring it up, when should I? I’m just not quite sure how to approach the issue…if I should even approach it at all. She didn’t say much at all when I asked what happened…just kept saying she was sorry and was busy. The good news is, she still wants to see eachother and obviously misses me, otherwise she wouldn’t have contacted me. What suggestions do you have about how I go about this? Anything, as always, helps.

Thanks again,
Harrison

[hmszuch]

Thank you so much April. I will absolutely take your advice on everything, and I will keep you posted on what happens. You deserve a medal for what you do! Helping men through the toughest of all topics….women lol Keep up the good work, I look forward to being in touch with you.

Harrison

[hmszuch]

April, you are amazing at what you do! Thank you for all of your responses! One last thing…what should I do if I call her tomorrow and she doesn’t answer? Should I leave a voicemail and if so what should I say? Or if she doesn’t answer just leave it alone? If she doesn’t answer or respond, when do I contact her again…if I even do? I want to see her, and she me, but I don’t want to be too agressive at all. I’m willing to take it as slow as it needs to go, I’m not in any rush at all. I’ve got a full time job while taking online courses to finish my masters…so I can’t deal with this in the back of my head constantly….way too distracting. Good thing is, I’ve got friends who I can talk to or do things with to take my mind off of it, or just go to the gym and take out my frustration on the weights lol Again, you’re freakin awesome April!

Harrison

[hmszuch]

I just need to know what you think the best thing for me to do is. I’ve decided to just give her space, time, whatever she needs. I don’t want to come across as suffocating…but I have very strong feelings towards this woman…and she told me how she felt about me first. Confusing…yes…ittitating…getting there….lost…definitely….hurt…sad to say but yes. I havent felt like this towards someone…not in my previous relationships…not ever…I know because I didn’t know that feeling existed until we met. Keep up the good work April, I’m letting everyone know how great your site is.

Thanks again,

Harrison

[hmszuch]

It’s just that she’s acting very very strange….not her usual self. Yes, she may be sick, but I can tell she’s not the way she used to be. And it all happened when she told me she got in an argument with him. What should my plan of action be? Should I communicate at all with her? She said she wanted to see me sometime this week, but it seemed like she was holding something back. She wouldn’t talk much. Women think in balls of yarn, men think in boxes….I believe anyway lol So I know I can’t read her mind or her thoughts, but I went from feeling like a kid again, like the happiest guy on the plantet, to being left in the dark and confused. It hurts…it hurts that someone like this would come into my life and all the sudden it feels like she’s gone. I know she’s not…and she may just need time alone to think and decide. I know it’ll all explain intself with time. You’re extremely helpful April, and I appreciate you taking the time to respond to me. Also, she sent me 2 pictures last week. The first said “Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else.”, with a couple on a bike. The second was a quote that said “Sometimes, all it takes is one person to show you that it’s okay to let your guard down, be yourself and love with no regrets.” Why would someone open up so much then all the sudden not respond? Is she playing me like a fool? I feel like a puppet on a string…the worst part is just not knowing because I havent had a chance to talk to her.

Thanks,

Harrison

[hmszuch]

Thank you for your response. I wanted to clarify one thing, I should’ve stated that we did go on 2 seperate dates, not hang out. I refer to hanging out as a date, I apologize. Our first date was a pleasant walk on the boarkwalk of our beach and sitting by the water and engaging in good conversations. I also need to mention that SHE was the one who made all of the first moves…not me. Our second date was supposed to be a baseball game but she ran late so we decided to just take a drive since the weather was nice. And both dates were very nice. We talked a lot we both said we felt a connection. Here’s what I think…and correct me if I’m wrong…but I feel as if the EX has noticed that she’s seeing someone, he’s gotten jealous, and now is playing nice guy…but she also mentioned that shes afraid that he will take her back to court for custody of her son….which I tried explaining to her that can’t happen…but I think she’s afraid. That’s what I personally think…..I could tell there was something she wasn’t telling me. All humans have that 6th sense…especially about someone you care for. Could this be an instance in which she is in fear of her ex? Being that he was very controlling in the past?

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