Forum Replies Created
-
MemberPosts
-
MonicaMember #382,721I’m really sorry this happened to you. What you experienced would leave anyone confused and hurt.
you didn’t do anything wrong. Her disappearing isn’t about you. It’s about her not being emotionally available or able to communicate honestly.
Recently divorced, stressed, hot-and-cold behavior, then a no-show with silence, that’s avoidance, not confusion.
What matters most: someone who cares doesn’t vanish. Even if she didn’t want to continue, a message is the bare minimum. Her silence is your answer.
Right now, the healthiest move is to stop reaching out and protect your self-respect. You showed up, you were kind, consistent, and open. That’s not the problem.
A few questions to think about:
1. Were you doing most of the initiating?
2. Did you feel anxious more than secure with her?
3. If she came back, what would you actually need from her to trust her again?You didn’t lose the right person, you met someone who couldn’t meet you fully.
If you want another take, you can also ask April.
MonicaMember #382,721Hello Melanie, it’s surprise to know that you were liking the guy for this long time
Sharing a tent can bring closeness, but it can also be awkward if it’s forced.
My advice? Let it be easy. Be yourself. Talk, laugh, see how it feels. If there’s a natural moment, eye contact, warmth, something mutual, you’ll feel it. If not, that’s okay too.
You don’t need to confess feelings or make a move just to avoid regret. What matters is whether he meets you halfway.
Sometimes the smartest move is simply staying open and present, not pushing the moment.
And if you’re still unsure, ask April.
January 9, 2026 at 11:32 am in reply to: feeling confused and hurt, need advice asap plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! #52006
MonicaMember #382,721It’s very bad to hear that the Girl cheated on you after a long 3 years of relationship
This isn’t love anymore, it’s attachment and hope. Her actions don’t match her words. She cheated, kept lying, ignored your boundaries, used your money, and keeps you close only when it suits her.
That’s not confusion. That’s choosing herself over you, again and again.
Love doesn’t make you beg. Love doesn’t disappear, reappear, and blame you for reacting. And love does not keep hurting you while asking for more chances.
You didn’t do anything wrong by loving deeply. But staying in this is breaking you.
Long distance only works when there’s trust, effort, and respect, and she’s giving you none of those consistently.
The best thing you can do now is stop chasing, stop explaining, stop trying to fix what she’s not protecting. Give yourself space. Let her go quiet, and stay quiet. That’s how you protect your heart.
If someone truly wants you, you won’t feel this anxious, confused, or disposable.
You deserve peace, not constant pain.
If you want another perspective, ask April.
January 9, 2026 at 7:01 am in reply to: Am I dating her, or just providing free emotional labor with snacks? #51988
MonicaMember #382,721Doing everything but not getting anything is not good at all
when something is real, it doesn’t leave you feeling confused all the time. It might move slowly, sure, but it doesn’t dodge the question. Someone who wants you won’t be afraid to name you.
She enjoys what you give her. The closeness, the jokes, the comfort, the security. But avoiding the label while expecting loyalty usually means she wants the benefits without the responsibility.
That’s not you being dramatic, that’s imbalance
You stop waiting when you notice you’re shrinking yourself just to keep the peace. When you’re doing everything right but still don’t know where you stand.
You don’t need to pressure her. Just be real and ask ,“I care about you, but I need to know what this is.” If she can’t meet you there, that’s your answer.
You deserve clarity, not clues.
If you need another perspective, ask April.
-
MemberPosts