Hi April,
It’s been 5 months and to update you, there were several other incidents with this ex-girlfriend – the most unpleasant of which was that she hung out with us on his birthday (I said yes because it was his birthday and I didn’t expect that “meeting up” meant hanging around for 2 hours) and started talking about another of his ex-girlfriends in front of me. The good thing was, he shut her up. And later on he apologised for having asked her along in the first place.
A few weeks ago, she called him to ‘catch up’ and when he told her he was planning to marry me, she made a joke that she didn’t expect him to get married on an elephant (which I thought was rude, as if that’s what we in the ‘Third World’ do). Now, this girl has accused me of making anonymous phone calls at night to her house. But my boyfriend believes me without me having to prove anything.
What’s bugging me now is, can I tell him to stop talking to her? Or is that too much to ask? Because he doesn’t have many friends that know him for a long time, so I don’t want to take his friendships away. I told him I respect his wishes to remain friends with her, but that he doesn’t have to tell me every gory detail of their conversation because she really says such offensive things.
To be fair, he’s not calling her – she is, and he’s just too nice to tell her he doesn’t want to talk. I’m afraid that him keeping such a friend around says more about him than about her. Or am I just not tolerant enough?
Thanks, April.
