[nightowl92]

this story is lengthy but i’ll try to shorten it as much as possible.
i dated a guy named s**** from 7th grade until just before the start of 10th grade. we were in love. he was my first love and part of me will always love him.
2 months ago, s**** old me he wanted a break, to see what else was out there, as neither of us have ever dated anyone else. naively, i was convinced until this point that he and i would be together forever.
a month after we broke up, our school homecoming dance came up. i went with my friends, even though i didn’t want to, just to prove i didn’t skip it because of him. it was at the dance that i met k**. it was an instant attraction. during a slow song we started talking about s****, as he was about 4 feet away from us dancing with this girl he had just started dating. i know, i shouldn’t have talked about s****, but it was during that conversation that k** told me about b*******, his ex, who dumped him 2 days before the dance. we sympathasized with each other, we understood each other. the next night, k** and i sat on the phone for almost 6 hours, we talked about literally everything imaginable. 3 days later, b******* called k**, she wanted him back. and he took her back.
to spite him and b******* being back together, i continued talking to k** in less then an innocent way.
his second chance with b******* lasted a week. they broke up and the next day he asked me out.
i was so happy with k**. the 3 weeks were together felt like days looking back at it, i don’t know why i ruined it, but i did. s**** told me he regretting leaving me, the next morning, he broke up with his girlfriend. this confused the hell out of me and i spazzed, i didn’t think about the majority of our relationship, just the good parts… i didn’t think about how happy i was with k**, i just thought about how things weren’t the same as they were with s****. i guess i didn’t realize that i was comparing how i felt about someone i had just started seeing, with how i felt about someone i had been in love with for 2 years. i broke up with k** that same night
it didn’t take me long to realize i made a mistake, 2 days after i broke up with him, i told k** i wanted a second chance and i would do whatever it took to get it.
since then, he’s been talking to me on myspace, but ignores me still in person. he says if i can prove to him that he can trust me, then we can talk about giving things another try. i want to be with him, i know this is a strong word but i think i may be in love with him, or at least i’m falling. after s****, i didn’t think that could happen to me again. but it has, and i don’t know what to do, now that i know what i want, i’m not sure how to get it.

i guess what i’m saying is, how do i earn his trust back? i’ll do anything. i just can’t think of anything that would help. i’ve already cut s**** out of my life entirely, it was the best way i could think to start.

please help

[April Masini]

Honestly, I do not think you should be focused on “earning his trust back”. Remember, he pretty much did the same thing you did… Didn’t he? He went back to his girlfriend and gave his former relationship another try, too. Right?

[b]What I would strongly suggest is that you [u]do not[/u] chase him.[/b] You’ve told him how you feel. The ball is in his court. Leave it there and let him pick it up and run with it when he’s ready.

I think that if you act like your normal friendly self around him — nothing more, nothing less — you will get the best result. Specifically, if he says “hi” to you, you say “hi” to him. If he doesn’t — you don’t. Let him set the pace. Let him pursue you.

Focus on your classes and your friends and let him come to you. If there was chemistry between you, he will. Just sit back, be patient and let him make the advances.

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