[mae4ever]

I like this guy, he’s 13yrs ahead of me.He’s funny and a joker.We know each other for such a couple of months.He used to give me a ride every time we go to church.We talked a lot when we we’re together going to church but he doesn’t text me or call me.he didn’t even asking me to go out.He doesn’t have a work because he just laid -off.I wanna know if he likes me but he is just hesitating to tell me because first, age gap secondly, my bf and I just broke up,third, he doesn’t have a work..
I’m asking if he likes me because there are some signs like he always make me laugh,give an advice,he always make a conversation,he tells me about his college days,family, his friends,(who are they) and he tells me on what he did for the whole week.and i caught him staring at me twice.And the last thing he did for me was he asked his friend if his friend can give me a ride going to church for 3 weeks because he’s going home to his country and I was surprised co’z he didn’t tell me about that.I mean at least he cared for me and I don’t know if it has a meaning or it’s just a friendly care.

P.S: I’m not showing any interests for him because I’m scared to ruin our friendship.Unless, he make the first move.

Please help me, I need an answer.

[Ask April Masini]

Your friend is probably a good guy who’s waiting until he has a job again, to ask you out on a date. I know that sounds twisted, but if you understand men, you’ll see it makes a lot of sense.

Men who are serious about you will want to be in a certain position in their own lives before they can become involved in a relationship with you. You have to understand the psychology of men so you don’t make yourself crazy. They want to be able to chase you, win you over, and then provide for you. I know some people think it’s old fashioned to think this way — but I’ve found that the successful relationships come when the men are really ready to be in the relationship they choose to be in. Too many relationships fall apart because a man doesn’t feel good about himself. The best and most stable relationships hang together through the tough times because both people have faith and confidence in [i]themselves[/i].

Because your friend is older than you are, he has more experience with relationships than you do, and he probably knows himself well enough to know he’s got to get his own act together before he asks you out, and forges into a relationship with you. Clearly, he likes you — and he likes you well enough not to want to put you into a precarious relationship when he’s not as stable as he could be.

Hang in there — he likes you, and he respects you. That he is getting you a ride to church while he’s away is a very good sign of his feelings for you and his own character. Don’t push. Don’t get neurotic. Just try to understand his own point of view on his relationship with you, and respect it. 🙂

[mae4ever]

thank you April Now, I think everything is clear for me now..

[mae4ever]

Ms. April don’t think that I’m crazy co’z I have another question again about another guy that I am interesting in.

I met this guy from the internet.(my space). He sent me a message saying he loves my primary photo.And then that all started.We known each other for 2 weeks and half.We always chat.The first time we met, we just took a walk. he said he likes me(he just said it over the internet, the chat!)And he wants to see me again.So we met again and walked.He compliments me like I’m beautiful.He also asked me a couple of times if do i have something to do on weekends.( I don’t know why he asked.)And I said ‘work” which is true.He’s a little bit of arrogant because when we first met he asked what i do, what work i have. And I said I’m a Hostess in a Restaurant.(April,I just got here in US. living here for 9 mos., and I have a Bachelors Degree in my country).And then he said “So u work as a Hostess just to make a LIL bit of money?” I got mute and didn’t say something because I got offended.He works as a executive technical support.take note he doesn’t have a degree and he’s 29 years old.

My question is does he really likes me or what?He didn’t ask for my number too.so I’m confused.And now while I’m writing this he actually just offline without saying anything to me.I asked him why he is so quiet.He didn’t chat me back and just got offline.So please help me so I’m gonna start to ignore and forget him.

[Ask April Masini]

I’m not sure why you got offended when he asked your profession, and then suggested you were a hostess “to make a little extra money.” What’s wrong with that question? 😕 It sounds like [i]you’ve[/i] got a chip on your shoulder about something. Why not just be honest with him? Instead, what you’ve done is criticize him for being a technician without a college degree — and, again, I’m not sure why that’s upsetting to you. If it’s important to you that the man you date has a college degree, then be honest with yourself about that, and don’t waste your time dating anyone who doesn’t. But overall, try and check yourself — you may be the one who’s the snob, not him! 😮

When he asked you what you were doing on the weekend, he was fishing around to see if you were free to go out on a date with him. When you told him you were working 😳 you thwarted his attempt at an advance. He felt shot down and that was the end of that. If you want to date this guy, you have to flirt with him, and make him think that you’re interested in him, and that you think he’s just really great. He’s giving you the cues, but you’re not giving him anything back. No wonder he’s cooled off!

Please get my book called Think & Date Like A Man. It will help you A LOT in your dating process with men, and help you achieve what you want — finding and keeping Mr. Right! You can download the book here: [url]http://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url].

[mae4ever]

But I already told him that I also like him.But the question is until now he is still not asking for my number.We’ve known each other for 3 weeks.And I don’t wanna make the first move to ask for his number..

Thank you..

[Ask April Masini]

You’re right — definitely don’t make the first move. And you have to understand that if he has your phone number and hasn’t asked you out — he’s not into you. At least not right now.

Do what I told you — read my book — and let me know after you read it, how it’s changed your mind and behavior about dating. You’re going to have your mind expanded when you read it, and realize why it’s so important not to do the asking out, and how to accept that when a guy doesn’t call you after three weeks of knowing you, that he’s not interested — and what you can do about that. That said, there ARE lots of things you can do to rev up your dating life.

[i]Read the book! [/i] You are someone who will really benefit from the advice. It’s a quick read — and come back to me after that with your questions. 🙂

[Ethan Morales]

it seems like he does like you, but he’s being cautious because of practical reasons age gap, your recent breakup, and his current job situation. His actions making you laugh, sharing personal stories, noticing you, arranging rides all point to interest and care. However, he’s holding back from making a move because he wants to feel stable and able to “offer” a proper relationship. This is a sign of respect and maturity, not disinterest.

He likes you and cares about you, but he’s waiting until he feels ready. Pressuring him or signaling too much interest too soon could make him hesitate more. Patience and observing his actions, like he’s doing with you, is the best approach right now.

[Natalie Noah]

The older man from church, He’s showing you gentle care in small, consistent ways rides to church, checking in, arranging for someone to look after you while he’s away. Those are the behaviors of someone who respects you and is waiting until he can stand on his feet before stepping into something more. That doesn’t mean he’ll never ask you out, but it does mean he’s thinking responsibly about timing. If your heart is curious, let him continue to be kind and open a little more, but don’t put your whole life on pause waiting for a question that may come when he’s ready.

Now about the second guy from the internet the one who made a rude comment about your work and then went quiet. That one needs a very different interpretation. He’s shown flashes of interest, yes, but also a lack of basic courtesy. Asking about your job in a dismissive way, not asking for your number, and then disappearing after you didn’t respond with flirtation? Those are signs he’s not emotionally mature enough for the kind of sincere attention you deserve. You deserve someone who listens, who asks gently, and who treats your life choices without judgment. If he can’t offer that, he’s not the one worth the mental energy.

What you can do gently and with self-respect is twofold: with the churchman, mirror his decency and let things unfold at a steady pace; with the online guy, name your worth and show it by not begging for attention. If you want him to be interested, give small warm signals but don’t chase. If he checks out or disrespects you again, let that be your cue to step back. The truth is, attraction that lasts is built as much on who a person is when they’re not trying hard (their habits, their kindness, their consistency) as it is on chemistry. Don’t confuse hustle with love.

You don’t owe anyone your patience or your dignity while they decide whether they want to show up for you. The right man will ask properly, won’t shame your work, and will make space for you without you having to beg for it. You are worthy of that kind of honoring and if you ever want, I’ll help you write a small, brave script to show interest without losing your center.

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