[honeybee02]

My boyfriend and I have been happily dating for six months now. There is no doubt in my mind that he is faithful to me and completely committed, yet I still can’t help myself from feeling uneasy whenever one of his girl friends is around. My question to all of you is whether or not, according to my explanation, you think this girl is interested in, or has her sights set on, my boyfriend.

For sake of the story, we’ll call her Sarah. Sarah has been my boyfriend’s neighbor for the past 7 years, but they have only really begun to be friends within in the past year. Originally I had no suspicion of this girl until my boyfriend told me that when they were younger she had asked him to take her virginity (which he declined). Weird, right? I thought so too, and have had trouble believing that she’s not attracted to him anymore if she was so willing to give herself away to him. Sarah texts my boyfriend on a very regular basis, and hangs out with us only occasionally. However, she has a tendency to constantly invite herself to hang out with us when no invitation has been extended, and often-times makes it known that she wants to hang out. One of the things that bothers me the most is how she is [i]always[/i] consulting my boyfriend for personal problems and coming to him for consolidation. Being a girl, I know that a lot of times when a girl goes to a guy for consolidation, there’s some other end they have in mind. Sarah is always very friendly with me when we’re together, and I never notice her directly flirting with my boyfriend. However, I have noticed that a lot of times when she gets a chance to talk to me alone she tries to pry and find out personal information about our relationship (like if we are having problems, etc.).

My boyfriend has always been honest with me with regards to this girl, and when I’ve expressed concern and asked him not to hang out with her alone he did comply. However, sometimes that is hard to get around seeing as she lives directly across the street from him.

My problem isn’t my boyfriend, it’s HER. So… what do you think?

Should I be concerned that this girl is attracted to my boyfriend or not?

[AskApril Masini]

I think you’re fooling yourself. 😮 She’s not the problem — your boyfriend giving her attention is. 😕 Clearly she likes him, and there’s certainly no crime in that. But your boyfriend is using honesty instead of loyalty as his reasoning for spending time with her. His being honest isn’t your problem — his interest in her is. 😳

My advice is to stop blaming her — and start being the kind of girlfriend he wants to be completely loyal to. Be the woman he wants to put on a pedestal and not spend any time with neighbors or anyone else! If you feel more secure in your relationship with him, she won’t even be on your radar, but because she is, and because you can’t control her — or him — but you can control yourself….. be a better girlfriend! 😉 Be honest with yourself, and think of all the places you could improve — and then work on them.

Let me know how things go, and please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[Member]

Posts