[WifeWithQuesstions]

Mid 40’s couple. Been together 17 years. Never had a 3some but fantasize about MFM & FMF all the time in bed. Husband wants a FF soon and told him I would be down for a MFM and see how it goes. He’s hoping to have a FF and a full on screw fest with a couple. I think that would be great, too but let’s get our feet wet first with a MFM threesome first. Will be easier for him to emotionally recuperate if he doesn’t like me with a man vs me seeing him screwing a woman and not like it.

We tried this 10 years ago with a couple. I wanted it too and met a nice couple. Our ground rules were condoms a must! About 4 seconds into everyone on the bed my husband was penetrating the other mans wife without a condom. Her husband was still enjoying me, kissing my neck… I stopped everything and left the scene of the crime never to see or hear from them again.

Just a bit of history lesson before I tell you about last night… We’ve been having amazing almost porn star quality sex for a few months. As much as he can handle, all 3 holes. Loving, sweet, he gets whatever he wants! I can’t state enough how my girl parts, all of them & ass has been on a silver platter for this man I’m madly in love with.

The MFM is so hot and he kept telling me that he so desperately wanted one. His main fantasy is to see my ass sore! I’m down for it.

A few nights ago we found ourselves without kids and we placed an ad on Craigslist for a guy. It was so exciting to see all the filthy replies. Finally found one I liked. We met him at a bar. I spotted him and left my husband at our table and went and sat down at the strangers table. He was handsome and seriously down to get laid. After sitting with him for only 5 minutes I realized I didn’t want to screw him. He was low iq but pretty. He was over half drunk and looks for couples every weekend. I started seeing him as nasty and left his table and politely declined. I think I just wanted more of the business man type.. I don’t know just didn’t want to do this guy. Husband sending me nasty texts… MMM.. love seeing this. He was turned on!

My hubs was understanding and said cool. Who else responded? Invite them out? I did try…. No luck.

The bar we were at is kind of known to have some willing couples / singles / swingers there but by no means it is a swingers bar.

Around 11:30 my husband asks should we buy the table of 3 next to us a drink which was 2 girls and a guy. I said, “No Please Don’t.” I didn’t want to send them a vibe because I don’t want o have couples sex or couples anything YET if ever. I’m still in discovery mode.

He smiled and said ok. He kept commenting there’s a lot of cute couples here and pointing them out to me. I smiled and said we are a long way from seducing a couple. He then asked so that door is open for sometime maybe? I said maybe but hoping to get my feet wet with MFM.

Trusting him feeling intimate with him emotionally he knew where my mind was….. Just a random guy for a MFM. Several times I told him and he was excited.

Midnight rolls around and I told him it’s not happening tonight we haven’t met anyone good enough FOR ME to blow my 17 year fidelity streak. Again he starts saying do you like that guy and his wife? I was in no mood for a couple! He was just enjoying the scenery. Moments later our barmaid comes around we order another round and a blonde woman comes to our table to order 2
drinks to our barmaid. When the blonde woman walks away my husband says to the barmaid…. put those drinks on my tab.

Bar maid walks away and I’m thinking did I just hear that right? I asked him wtf who are WE buying drinks for ? He points out the couple. The WTF you can’t be serious look on my face! He said I’m sorry do you want me to cancel that? Yes! so he went to the bar like an idiot and told the barmaid to put those drinks on their own tab. The couple never knew.

He comes back to table after eyeballing another couple on the way back that he’s been trying to point out to me 3 tables over…. Noticed my mood has made a 180. I can’t even look at him. We decide to leave. The one hour trip home I told him….. I’m sitting right here why don’t you ask me hey should WE buy them a drink? I had already said please no once before but he did it right in front of my face without thinking how I would feel.

I felt violated like what reaction was he looking for out of the couple? What reaction did he think he was going to get from me? Want them to come over and say thank you? I don’t want a couple at our table when we have our eye on the MFM prize.

I can still barely look at him or talk to him, hurt, pissed off and let down. He knows how important this first MFM was to me to be able to look past the
previous situation. He says he’s sorry bla bla bla

Sounds petty when I write it all down but still this makes me 95% sure this won’t work having 3somes. He’s nowhere near ready or WTF should I do? I’m feeling heartbroken that I was offered this slutty wife gift but feel he can’t protect me through it. Sad part is he says he just wants me to be happy but can’t seem to think with his brain first and protect me emotionally,

Was it the Crown and coke talking? I don’t give a crap what was talking, it was coming out of his face. My loving husbands face.

Need new prospective, please!!

[April Masini, your AskApril]

If you read the queries from people who are interested in threesomes, on this advice site alone, they always end badly. If you’re really looking for monogamy with your husband of 17 years, with whom you seem to have a few kids, this isn’t the way to give yourself good odds. Whenever there’s a third person, or a couple, or a group in your bed, someone gets hurt, emotionally, and relationships do tend to fall apart. Sometimes you have to choose between what feels good in the short term and what feels good in the long term. The thrill that most people find in group sex, doesn’t usually last, and couples often split up over these encounters.

If you have any specific questions, you’re welcome to ask, and I’ll do my best to answer.

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