[emilyberg14]

I work with this guy, I met him for the first time since we are on staff together. We live where we work and I see him around often. He is 21, and I am 19. He is a sprinter on the track & field team at our college. As he was getting to know me, I noticed more often that he naturally began flirting with me. Of course, I ended up flirting back because I felt that it was the natural thing to do. I really felt that as we got to hangout more often, we were connecting on a deeper level. Whenever I am around him everything runs smoothly, there is no pressure on us to make conversation. Sometimes we don’t speak and he just hugs me close. As his friend, I pay attention to his non verbal gestures… I also pay attention to when he says he loves me. He has said “I love you” in a very casual, smooth tone. I picked up on his cue. Although, lately he has been laid back and we haven’t really gotten to connect. I miss him when I don’t see him and sometimes feel like it’s not worth it. I wonder if he is too caught up in his own life to know that I really want to be his girl. I am trying to be myself around him the most, and it seems like our time is always special when we get together. I just can’t tell his intentions, if I am just a fling for him or if he is looking into further possibilities between us? I like that he and I have very similar views, and the only thing is sometimes if we talk about plans it is a 50/50 whether it ends up happening or not.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

If a guy wants to date you, you’ll know it because he will ask you out. But you mention his making plans with you, and then only showing up half the time, and you’re not sure which half of the time he’s going to show. 😕 This doesn’t sound like he’s all that anxious to see you because if he was, he’d be there 100% of the time.

It sounds like he likes you as a friend, now, and it’s important that you don’t friend zone yourself. Don’t be so available and give him something to miss. If he does miss you, he’ll do something about it. If he doesn’t then that’s your cue to move on. 😉

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[emilyberg14]

Thank you for this good advice. I agree with you on a lot of it actually and you word it very well. So could you explain to me a little bit more about what you mean by being sure not to put myself in the friend zone? Sometimes I am around and sometimes I am not. Hopefully he does think about me when I’m gone 😉 Over Thanksgiving, we are both going to be working and their will be only one other staff member on duty. During this time, we might get some chances to have alone one on one times. What can I do, to encourage him to be more than friends? My sister told me that she thinks non verbal gestures is a big move on his end.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

For the best, most comprehensive advice, I think you should buy and read Think & Date Like A Man, the book I wrote for women who want to find, get and keep Mr. Right. You can buy it for $8.99 as an automatically downloaded e-book here: [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url]. You’ll get lots of advice on how to reel him in in the book.

Basically, you have to not friend zone yourself by not being available too much, and when you are, really flirting with him, and making him want to see you more. You have to use your feminine charms and allure him. Many women befriend guys and then wonder why the guys don’t ask them out on dates. Well, if a guy thinks of you as a friend, and as available often, he’s not going to chase you and try to make you his girlfriend. 😉

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[emilyberg14]

ooh this is getting interesting, I might have to take up on your offer about the book. It seems like a good read and I am sure that once you purchase it online, you get instant access to it right away by downloading it. This might help me better to get on the right track of the situation. I like what you said about using my feminine charms to allure him…. Part of this for many girls is knowing what their own charms are, and once they have figured it out it makes it a lot easier because they can learn to enhance them. For this guy, a couple of the important charms I think I have that he likes are my simplicity and the smell of my perfumes 🙂 I think guys enjoy that about my personality. I do have another question for you though along the same lines. Lately, i’d been finding myself reading my daily horoscopes online. I am a Capricorn, and I don’t know if it’s just coincidental or what but more often it has been seeming that my daily readings have been matching to what is actually happening. It’s like the reading is basic, but then by the end of the day I am able to interpret what it meant and find the match up. What do you think about that?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I wish I could tell you! But astrology isn’t my specialty. I do think you’ll get a lot out of the book. 😉

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[emilyberg14]

Well thanks anyways, you have been a big help. Especially in terms of how I approach my situation and put it into a realistic perspective. I hope my questions were clear enough, I know I will get my fairytale someday… but for now friends are always charming! You seem like a pretty cool person yourself 🙂 I will let you know if anything special comes along!

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You’re very welcome! 😀

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