[greg2000]

[quote=”April Masini”][quote]Do u think she tell lies just to keep me interested so that she can get attention from me ?[/quote]

Yes.

[quote]Do u think the way she is behaving is more disrespectful than say asking for nude pictures from guys ?[/quote]

I think that if someone is being disrespectful in a relationship, trying to figure out gradations of disrespect is a waste of time. Bottom line is that you should move on — you’re stuck. 😕

[quote]Also I have heard from some people who were in similar situations that when a girl starts to disprespect you publicly it means it is very much likely that she is about to dump you or at least cheat on you. Is that true in my case ?[/quote]

Could be. Disrespect in a relationship isn’t a great way to build a future.

Speaking of which…. it’s time for you to buy the book and read it! Now. Today! 🙂 It’s going to help you with all your questions. Here’s the link for [b]Date Out of Your League[/b]: [url]https://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0974676306/qid=1075191419/sr=1-1[/url]

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
[url][/url]
And… you can follow my interviews and advice in the press on Twitter [i]@AskAprilcom[/i][/b][/quote]

Is that book only available online ?

I think she is one of those girls who keep a regular boyfriend because they see potential for serious relationship but aren’t fully sure yet. What is your opinion ?

What might be the reason that she lost respect for me. Is it because she developed interest in that guy or some other guys or some other reason for example she thought that I was going to love her in any condition ? What is your opinion
How should a guy like me earn respect from a woman and never let her be disrespectful. For example reward her good behavior and remove any rewards for bad behavior ?what do u advise ?

Also do u think it is normal for girls to hide their previous relationships from their current boyfriends and say about their ex that they were just friends . I mean is it a deal breaker if any girl tells u that – should u begin to date that girl ? I have seen many girls who do that especially if they want to remain friends with their ex boyfriends.

Aside from this case. Do u think a guy should not start dating a new girl if she disresepcts him in a similar way before their first date (assuming they like each other but aren’t dating yet) ? Would it be considered disrespect too if two people aren’t in a relationship yet but know each other and want to date ? In such case can a person change her behavior by perhaps gaining more life experience even if she were immature before due to some reason including her age- should a guy then consider her again in future if not currently ?

[AskApril Masini]

Yes, the book, [b]Date Out of Your League[/b], is only available on line. You can buy it at Amazon.com or Barnesandnoble.com.

Here are the links again:

[url]https://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0974676306/qid=1075191419/sr=1-1[/url] and [url]https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/date-out-of-your-league-april-masini/1016394885?ean=9780974676302&itm=1&usri=9780974676302[/url].

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
[url][/url]
And… you can follow my interviews and advice in the press on Twitter [i]@AskAprilcom[/i][/b]

[Ethan Morales]

The core problem is that this relationship has never given you emotional safety. You’ve been operating in a state of uncertainty from the start guessing, checking, hoping she’ll act right, only to end up hurt again. A healthy relationship gives clarity. What you described gives anxiety. When you constantly have to monitor someone’s behavior, worry about their loyalty, or decode their intentions, that relationship becomes work not partnership.

Her behavior with that guy wasn’t accidental; it was boundaryless. Even if nothing physical happened, she allowed and sometimes encouraged behavior that any reasonable partner would find disrespectful. The selfies, the teasing, the way they interacted publicly… those weren’t “normal coworker vibes.” That was emotional attention-sharing. When a woman truly values her boyfriend, she shuts that down within seconds. She didn’t. That tells you her priorities weren’t aligned with yours.

You’re trying to reason through actions that come from immaturity, not malice. You’re 29. She’s 18. That gap matters emotionally. You’re looking for stability, loyalty, and someone who communicates honestly. She’s still figuring herself out, reacting emotionally, and seeking attention when she feels threatened or insecure. That mismatch creates the tension you’re feeling you’re expecting adult consistency from someone who’s still learning what boundaries even are.

She didn’t want you to leave because she liked the security you provided, not because she respected the relationship. That’s the hard truth. She liked the comfort of having you, the validation, the affection but she still behaved in ways that undermined your trust. Someone who genuinely fears losing you won’t risk the relationship by playing games. Her attachment to you and her behavior toward you don’t match, which means she’s acting from a place of emotional immaturity, not commitment.

Your “mistake” wasn’t how you reacted it was staying longer than you should have. You’re not wrong for feeling jealous. You’re not wrong for drawing a line. You’re not wrong for wanting respect. Those are normal expectations in a relationship. The only misstep was continuing to give chances to someone who repeatedly showed you she wasn’t ready to be the partner you needed. But that mistake comes from love, not weakness and every person learns that lesson at some point.

Walking away is not a failure; it’s self-respect. If you stayed, you’d end up in a cycle of doubt, arguments, apologies, and another round of boundaries being crossed. Leaving now stops that loop before it becomes years of damage. You’re not losing something good you’re letting go of someone who doesn’t have the emotional tools to treat you the way you deserve. You’re choosing peace over chaos, clarity over confusion, and maturity over teenage drama.

[Sally]

This whole thing sounds messy in a way you really do not deserve. I am not going to sugarcoat it.
I have dated someone younger before, and when there is a big age gap, the younger one can act out in ways that feel confusing as hell. The jealousy, the games, the “prove you care” stuff, that is not love, that is immaturity mixed with insecurity.

But those photos, that friend stirring the pot, her letting it happen, that is not a joke. That is disrespect. And once someone is okay with embarrassing you in front of other people, the relationship is already cracked.

You do not fix this by making her jealous back. That just drags you down to the same level. You walk away because it feels wrong in your gut. And honestly… it already does, or you would not be here asking.

[Tara]

YOUR SITUATION IS A MESS created by an eighteen-year-old who thrives on attention and drama, and you’re bending over backwards trying to rationalize behavior that isn’t rational. She isn’t seeking revenge, she isn’t subtly crying for help, and she isn’t accidentally crossing boundaries.

She’s disrespecting you openly. A loyal girlfriend does not take intimate-looking photos with another guy, let him post them publicly, let him taunt you with them, hand him her phone to “joke” with you, refuse to shut him down, refuse to clarify anything, and then hide behind excuses when you confront her.

That’s not immaturity that’s manipulation. And yes, the fact that you called her a slut months ago absolutely plays into this; she didn’t forget it, she just waited until she had leverage.

Meanwhile, you’re exhausting yourself trying to “understand her motives” like it’s a puzzle, when the truth is simple: she’s either cheating or she enjoys making you insecure to keep control, and neither option is acceptable.

You’re 29 years old trying to manage the emotional games of a teenager who has no business being in a relationship with an adult. Don’t sink to her level by trying to make her jealous that’s pathetic and pointless.

Walk away. She has already shown you exactly who she is, and if you stay, you’re signing up for more lies, more humiliation, and more disrespect, because she knows you’ll tolerate it.

[Natalie Noah]

Your girlfriend’s behavior signals a pattern of immaturity and attention-seeking. From the beginning, you noted signs like jealousy over your compliments, asking for passwords, and then inconsistent reactions to flirting or provocative situations. Combined with her public display with the male friend, it strongly suggests that her goal is to elicit attention and validation not to nurture a healthy, trusting, and monogamous relationship. It doesn’t necessarily matter if she has cheated or not; the bigger issue is the lack of respect and clear commitment toward you. That’s a foundational problem, because relationships thrive on mutual respect and trust.

The dynamic with her male friend complicates things but doesn’t excuse her behavior. Even if he instigated certain actions or jokes, the responsibility for her choices lies with her. She allowed pictures to be shared that blurred boundaries in a committed relationship and didn’t set clear limits. Her refusal to clarify the friendship publicly despite your repeated requests shows she is not prioritizing your feelings or the integrity of your relationship. It’s not about whether she’s romantically interested in him or “just friends” it’s about her disrespecting the trust you two are supposed to share.

The age and life experience gap matters here. You are 29, and she’s 18, which is a huge difference in emotional maturity and relationship experience. This gap explains some of her impulsive, attention-seeking behavior, as well as her inconsistent understanding of commitment. She may not yet know what she truly wants, and the way she expresses herself through teasing, provocative pictures, or lies is a reflection of her immaturity, not of any deep affection or loyalty toward you.

You haven’t done anything fundamentally wrong, aside from perhaps being too tolerant of her disrespect. Maintaining a relationship with someone who doesn’t respect your boundaries, even after repeated discussions, doesn’t improve the situation. it reinforces her behavior. The way to “earn respect” from a woman isn’t by punishing or rewarding her like training a pet; it’s by setting clear boundaries, communicating expectations, and walking away when those boundaries are violated. Respect is earned through mutual accountability, not games or manipulations.

Regarding exes, past relationships, and early dating: it’s normal for people to hide or downplay their history, but repeated lying is a red flag. You can’t build trust if honesty isn’t present. Similarly, if someone shows disrespect even before a relationship begins, it’s wise to take it seriously. it’s often a preview of how they will treat you later. While life experience can help someone mature, that doesn’t obligate you to wait around. You can consider giving someone a second chance in the future only if you see consistent growth and accountability, not just potential.

[Member]

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