[iaj32]

A few weeks ago I met this guy, we ended up going out and we really hit it off. We’ve seen each other a few times since then and text each other pretty regularly. He’s really good looking, very nice, and we have a lot in common. I like him a lot.

The first few weeks I felt like I liked him but didn’t expect very much. Just figured I’d enjoy spending time with him and see how things went. But suddenly I can’t stop thinking about him, I’m constantly talking about him (which is driving my family and friends crazy) and I’m just crazy over him. It sounds ridiculous, but ever since he kissed me I feel like this. No one has ever kissed me like that before. If there was a kissing olympics, he’d win gold for sure.

When I’m around him or talk to him, I manage to play it cool. I show interest but I’m not all over him or obsessive. Just a hint of it here and there. If anything, I might not show enough interest because of how I really feel and I’m afraid of that coming out.

Like I said, I don’t really expect a lot and we still hardly know each other, so it’s possible that this won’t ever even go anywhere and so I don’t wanna get too crazy over him and cause myself all kinds of heartache if things don’t work out. How can I keep myself from falling too hard for him too quick? And how should I handle how I’m already feeling?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Good questions!

[quote] How can I keep myself from falling too hard for him too quick? And how should I handle how I’m already feeling?[/quote]

First of all, understand the dating game. Dating is a way for you to figure out if someone is right for you and they’re doing the same thing at the same time. This requires knowing yourself, first and foremost, and what you want in a man, a relationship, and what you’re willing (and capable) of giving and not giving. This is where most people go wrong. So, while he may be an Olympic gold medal kisser, if he’s living with his parents or is 50 and never had a relationship that lasted more than three months, you’re not compatible if you’re looking for a husband. Use the dating process to get to know him and yourself, and around month three decide if this is someone you want to continue dating or not — and realize he’s doing the same thing. Knowing the harsh realities may temper your expectations.

Second of all, keep your options open. He probably is.

Third, don’t start talking about someone you’ve only known for a few weeks, to family and friends. Now, you’ve got an audience for the relationship, and this isn’t a good idea. Relationships aren’t team sports. Choose one or two friends to confide in, but that’s it.

And lastly, remember your feelings are one thing, but your behavior is another. Just because you have a feeling doesn’t mean you have to give it a platform. Discipline is your friend here. Have your feelings, but don’t exercise them all the time. Just because you miss him, doesn’t mean you should call him.

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go, and please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 😀

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