After 3 instances where the guy that I would like to go out with ends up asking me to “put in a good word with my friend for him” I thought I’d come to the column and get some advise on why this is possibly happening? I’m a pretty athletically built, professionally successful, confident and social single female. I enjoy social outings and lately over the past year have started taking one of my newly divorced girlfriends along to get her out of her house and around other adults and not just her 7 yr old son. In 3 specific outings I have been having nice, lengthy conversation with a single guy who I am acquaintances with and would enjoy going out with then when she and I leave the area, I either follow up with a note to the guy or he reaches out to me. If I initiate the contact the conversation has turned to questions about my friend and then end with him asking me to put in a good word with my friend on his behalf. The part that is so baffling is that she doesn’t really converse with them much other than me introducing her to him so there isn’t time for him to get to know her, etc in the time I’m chatty with him. If he reaches out to me after it is always to find out if I will share her contact info and if not, ask me to share his with her.
I love this girlfriend dearly but honestly am getting to the point where I don’t want to invite her for social outings if guys will always go for her over me. Like I said, I’m confident, I have no major issues about my looks or body build, and I talk easily with guys so I’d like some feedback on what I may be doing to have this result continuously?
