[mandylynn001]

my boyfriend and i have been together for about 3yrs and I love him alot but he doesnt show me the same affection as i show him, he doesnt like to kiss, he doesnt like to cuddle where as when we first dated he did, his idea of cuddling is me playing with his hair or rubbing his feet or back, and he doesnt realy say i love you unless he is leaving or texts it to me when I say I love you to him he says Uh huh or ignores me which hurts.
anyways our sex life isnt realy exsistant right now he gets kinda mad when i touch him or like want sex he is “to tired” and i feel like i am bagging him alot for it he says its because he is tired and stressed from working and i dont think he is cheating because he is always at work or home or at his brothers place helping him build his house.
anyways i am bi sexual and he knows that and he is always making comments on wheither i think my friends are hot or not or if id do this girl or that girl he has cheated on me once last year and i have forgiven him for it and we have moved on but he keeps bugging me for a threesome but i dont want to have one right now i do not find anygirls attractive and why should he be rewarded for bad behaviour he cheated exactly one year ago and i feel like it is a change of season thing but i also feel like he just wants a threesome to cheat and not be guilty i just dont want one,
we had this mini threesome thing last year with a friend of mine where we’d all make out togehter and like get touchy feely there was no sex at all but it kinda made me sick to see him on another girl but at the same time it turned me on and i dont know why, also i know he cheated on me and sometimes when we have sex i imagine him sleeping with the girl he cheated with and it turns me on, what is wrong with me?? I know i dont want a threesome for sure it just makes me mad when he keeps brining it up and i keep telling him no i am almost at the pint of doing it just to make him happy but i know i will not be happy after because i had one with an ex bf and he and the girl ended up going behind my back and fucking eachother and i dont want that to happen again is there anyway for me to tell him withougt making him mad?

can someone tell me why it turns me on th think of him fucking another girl an
and how to tell him no

[AskApril Masini]

The problem you seem to have is that you’re not acknowledging your boyfriend’s behavior and taking it seriously. You have some very strong warning lights that this relationship is dead, and you’re ignoring them, at least consciously. Subconsciously, I think you know, and you’re writing me so I can tell you what you know and don’t want to accept.

Your boyfriend of 3 years cheated on you a year ago, and now he doesn’t show you any affection, doesn’t ever say, “I love you,” or respond to you in kind when you say it first, and your sex life is non-existent. Hmm….can’t you see that he’s finished, but he isn’t cutting you loose? He’s not treating you like he loves you. In fact, he’s not treating you like you’re his girlfriend. He’s treating you like a wife he wishes he didn’t have, but is too lazy to get divorced from.

You are using his interest in a threesome to distract yourself from the truth: It’s time to move on, your boyfriend doesn’t respect you or love you any more. Sorry. But it’s better you hear the truth.

Anything you say about a threesome has nothing to do with the real problem here — except that you’re right that a threesome is a way for him to have sex with another woman “with your permission”. Bad idea. A threesome at this point is just going to waste your time in this relationship and hurt your feelings.

So, I’d advise you to accept reality, break up with your boyfriend and start dating other men. Three years is too much time for you to date someone who treats you the way you’re currently being treated. You deserve better — and, frankly, he does, too. It’s in both of your best interests to put this relationship to rest and move on.

[Belle]

Wanting a threesome while refusing basic affection is wild. You can’t skip intimacy and jump straight to fantasy.

[Member]

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