[Lisa]

Hi! I am an 18 year old girl and I need an advice about a shy guy I like. I’ve known this guy almost since I was ten years old. Our relationship was “Hello” and “Goodbye” until the past three years, when I got closer to him and we’ve became friends. We swam together in a team where I was the younger and almost only girl, surrounded by slightly older males. They saw me as their sister, and I saw them as my brothers. And then, 2 years ago, I fell for him. He’s 4 years older than me, never had a girlfriend and is super shy and introvert. He’s the kind of quiet guy which talks little, but always says something interesting/funny when he does. We see each other almost everyday on swimming practices but we never did anything just the two of us, outside the “swimming world”. He offers to drive me home everyday, but does it to another guy also. He’s sensitive, caring, gentle, worried and sympathetic towards me, and often does amazing gestures that I don’t picture any of my friends doing.. but then again, I don’t know if it is because he loves me or simply because he’s such a great friend and person. I’m tired of being in this situation, but despite being an extrovert girl, I’m quite shy in the “love department”, even more with an older guy (I fear he might see me as little girl with a crush..). Also, I like him too much to risk any weirdness in our relation, since I’m not sure he likes me (maybe he sees me as a sister..). On the other hand, I really want to move forward, to do something about it, but what? Tell him? Too childish! Kiss him? Too intense! Show little signs? I’ve been doing that for the past 2 years and nothing….
I am hoping you have an advice for me. Thank you and kind regards,
Lisa

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Don’t tell him your feelings and don’t kiss him. In spite of your guy being shy, the bottom line is that all men want to chase a woman and catch her. If you start giving the impression that you’re being the aggressor, you’ve taken away his opportunity to ask you out and feel like a million bucks when you say yes.

The problem for you is getting out of the friend zone. You’re going to have to get him to see you as a woman — not the girl he’s grown up with. This will take some effort on your part, and I think you can be creative and have fun with it. Start with your appearance, and dial up your flirtatious and sexy self — with clothes, with makeup, with your behavior — make him want you because you’re a woman — not because you’re a nice girl he has things in common with.

You’re not too young to read Think & Date Like A Man, [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], in fact, it’s a really good book for you to read to understand men, dating, and how to get the guy you want! If you read this now you’re going to be way further ahead of most women when it comes to successful relationships.

Let me know how it goes!

[Member]

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