Big picture: If your relationship isn’t working out, you have to look at why, before you can fix it. You’ve rattled off a bunch of smaller problems, but I don’t think that they’re the reason for the failing — I think they’re the symptoms of it.
Smaller picture problems: It sounds like the dance party situation can be solved by you going with her and dancing with her. You don’t have to drink to dance — and if the crowd at a particular club is disrespectful, then find some other clubs to go to — or talk to the manager of the club.
As for the guy at work who has a crush on her — there will be men and women in both your lives who will crush on you and even fall in love with you — but that doesn’t mean either one of you has to do anything about it. If she’s interested in someone else, then your best defense is a good offense. Being someone she wants to text and call and spend time with is what you want to aim for. And the same is true in reverse for her — there will be a time when a woman crushes on you, and she won’t like it, either.
But if you think she’s losing interest in you and is more interested in dating this other guy, or being available at clubs to meet other men, then you have to understand that rejection is also part of life. Not every relationship works out, and rather than force it, sometimes you have to accept rejection as a gift — who wants to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you back? 😉
If there’s a deeper reason for the relationship not working out, which I think is what’s going on here, then it’s time to look at that bigger, more fundamental problem. Otherwise, you’re going to spin your wheels trying to solve little problems that are just symptoms of a growing, bigger issue.
I hope this helps.
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