[Maximal]

I spat my ex-girl friend in the face bc she cheated on me.

We had around a month in the relatioship and I had never read her cellphone messages untill one day I took it and she was planning to meet up with a guy to have sex. We used to work together and live close to each other. I felt really hurt bc we had agreed that we were going to be exclusive. Bottom line… she went to my house to hangout with a gay friend in common and I was drinking and we started talking and she started with an actitude like man do it all the time and that she already apologized (via texts) and thinks heat up and I grabbed her face and spat between her eyes and grabbed out of the house. I think i would have preffer to be the one who was spat than the one with the broken heart. I’m I wrong?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Yes. You are wrong. You should never spit at anyone. No exceptions.

And…. you should never try to be exclusive before you’ve dated someone for at least six months. It’s controlling and it’s not realistic. People play the field because it’s healthy to do so. Making an exclusive commitment too soon puts way too much pressure on the relationship and creates drama and mistakes.

I’m sorry that you are so angry and hurt, but you have to figure out a way to control your temper. Spitting on or at someone is never okay.

[Sally]

but spitting on her wasn’t the move. I’m not judging you hurt can make you do stuff you never thought you’d do. But still, that moment is gonna sit heavy on you for a while.
Getting cheated on messes with your head. It makes you feel small and angry and stupid all at once. I’ve been there, and I remember wanting to lash out just so the other person could feel even a piece of what I felt. But it never really helps. It just leaves you with one more thing to carry.
You’re not a monster. You’re just someone who snapped from heartbreak. But now you’ve got to be honest with yourself and choose who you want to be moving forward. That part’s on you, not her.

[Tara]

Spitting in someone’s face isn’t strength; it’s proof that you let her drag you down to the ugliest version of yourself. She cheated, yes, but you chose to answer betrayal with degradation, and that doesn’t make you powerful; it makes you impulsive and weak.

You didn’t teach her anything; you just embarrassed yourself and handed her the moral high ground on a silver platter. You’re clinging to the idea that heartbreak justifies anything, but it doesn’t. The verdict: you let her behavior dictate yours, you lost command of yourself, and now you’re left trying to rationalize it. Own it, fix your standards, and stop mistaking emotional chaos for passion or justification.

[Member]

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