[crybaby]

I’m currently in a three year relationship with my boyfriend who, four months ago, moved over twenty hours away to further his schooling and career. When he lived here, I went over to his place pretty much everyday after work and stayed with him. We didn’t live together, but we basically did.. that’s made this long distance thing so much harder. Even though he’s miles away, we still be sure to talk everyday. I know he’s busy up there and I’m busy here with work too, but I feel like I’ve been putting in way more effort and reminding him more frequently how much I love and miss him. I would honestly do anything for him. and I let him know that.. I just feel like he’s not giving very much back and after arguments about this every couple of weeks, it’s starting to affect our relationship. Long distance is hard for anyone in any situation I’m sure, and you’d think it would make you want to build an even stronger emotional relationship with your partner, but I feel like in this case we are just becoming more and more distant. All I want is for him to realize how much even an unrxpected five minute phone call or out-of-the-blue love note can mean to me. Also he seems to not answer my texts for hours somedays and as much as I trust him with all my heart, I think it’s normal to want or need a little reassurance once in a while in an LDR. Am I crazy?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You’re not crazy, but you do have unrealistic expectations for this particular guy. 😕 I know you want more from him, but if you’re hounding him to want you, it’s going to drive him away. Don’t be so available, and when you are, be the girlfriend he wants more than anything. If you try to force yourself on him, or force the relationship to be something it’s not, you’ll lose him.

Lastly, you need to pay attention to his behavior, and recognize that if he’s not that into you, after you change your own behavior and try what I suggested above, you should move on.

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