Your feelings are understandable and if you read the posts on this forum, you’ll see that you are not alone. I get many, many posts from (mostly) men who wish they were their girlfriends’ or wives’ first.
What can break up the relationship is jealousy so let me help you with that. First of all, all of the experiences your girlfriend had before she met you have made her who she is — the woman you fell in love with. Those experiences are good, bad, awful, wonderful — they probably run the gamut. If you understand that she has a maturity and sophistication due to her past, and that past is part of her present that you love, maybe you can be more accepting.
Remember that anyone she’s been with in the past is now just that — her past. YOU are the one she’s chosen to be with, so celebrate that win on your part! My guess is that although you are not her first, you are her best! 😎 And she wouldn’t have a basis from which to judge if she hadn’t had a past. So thank those other guys in her past for making YOU look so good! 🙂
Remember that she has a bright future, and you have one together, as well. There are many things you can be the first at — and I’m not just talking about romance or sex (although those count, too!). Make your relationship so special that every month there is some sparkling first that can never be repeated: be the first one to take her skiing or the first one to take her to feed the homeless on Christmas morning. You can come up with a list of your own firsts that you want to share with her.
I hope that helps. Let me know how things go — and join me @AskAprilcom on Twitter, and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].
