[soitsnotme]

I understand what you are saying. I am not completely sure I think he is dating other people though, considering how often I talk to him. With him owning his own business and constantly communicating with me throughout the day and night, I don’t see how he would even have time to be dating other people when he spends so much time with me online and through the phone.

I understand that 2 years without meeting can seem like a stretch, but with both of our schedules it has been very difficult for us to plan a trip, it is not a one sided thing when trying to make plans. We both have been waiting for a time when we could spend at least a week or so together since we live across the country from one another and planning a one or two day thing isn’t really considered an option for either of us. Spending as much time together as we do, it helps any kind of long distance relationship to make it a little easier to deal with the lack of physically hanging out, so the 2 years hasn’t really even felt like that long.

Saying that he is using his mother’s passing as an excuse, although I can see how someone can come to that conclusion, I think in some cases that isn’t necessarily true. Wouldn’t be POSSIBLE that when his mother died, it changed his world (as it would with anyone losing a parent), and he truly doesn’t feel that being in a relationship is good for him right now because he is still grieving? Honestly if I had lost someone that close to me I wouldn’t even be thinking about a relationship either. I am slowly seeing him grieve less and less, which has been parallel to also seeing that he is slowly starting to talk with me in a more loving than in a friendly way, so I can tell he is slowly recovering over his loss.

It may be hard for some to believe since we primarily talk online, but we know each other very well and are very close. The idea of him using his mother’s death as an excuse for anything would make him sick. Him and I have had several conversations about what he is going through and my concern from my post wasn’t whether he was being honest. If I come off as sounding ignorant or naive about his honesty, that’s for other’s to care about I guess, but that isn’t my concern and I have no doubts about his honesty.

My concern is if, along with his loss, he could have also lost any interest in being more than friends with me, or if with time he can heal and his want for a relationship with me can resurface. Again, since I have never lost a parent, I can never completely understand just how life changing it is or determine whether I could ever be the same again, even if I do slowly start to grieve less and heal.

[soitsnotme]

I’ve noticed that the question of ages is always brought up in other posts, which I forgot to include. I am 24 and he just turned 29. And when I said after a few weeks of meeting he asked me to be his girlfriend, I meant after meeting online. We have not yet met in person. We had plans to after a year of talking (we both decided we didn’t want to rush into meeting so even though a year may seem long, it felt like the right time for us before his mother passed) We have not had successful plans of meeting over the past year since his mother passed because he hasn’t felt ready since then and it falls back on his not wanting a girlfriend as well. Since him and I talk every single day, usually through texts throughout the day while working and for hours on end every night, the idea of actually meeting in person is easier to wait on until we both have the time to make plans for a meeting.

Just some more background on my situation I guess, if it helps. Thanks in advance.

[Member]

Posts