[jcao226]

Do you think that over time she will start to appreciate everything i did for her, or what we had? Or miss me after being with me for 5 years and just suddenly completely stop talking to me? I told you i decided to get my feet back on the ground, but at the end of the day, theres not a day that goes by that i dont think about it. In a way i just cant help but hold on to some pieces, hoping that after dating this guy shell realize she made a mistake. i understand you say our relationship has run its course, but are there ever times where after dating some guy, people realize they made a mistake and want to get back with the previous boyfriend? That maybe this is the only way for her to know or realize since im all shes never known. The day i decided to let go and not monitor her every move, was the day i liberated myself and stared to feel better. But im hoping there is a chance with me and her in the near future. And i understand there are many girls out there, but for some reason i just want to be with her. I can only hope. Reading your first message gave me clarity on why she would do this. Maybe after she tests the waters, shell start to see the difference. But as of now, All i can hope for is that faith will bring us back together again. Working on myself this week has been different, there were alot of things i gave up when we got together such as music or reuniting with old friends again. It has been keeping my self esteem up. But i woke up this morning feeling really empty. I can only hope April. I would really hate to believe that our relationship has ran its course, maybe well meet again some day.

[jcao226]

So ive decided to move on. It has been a rough 2 months for me. She had broken up with me on the phone again. She told me she was confused. i received a call from her friend saying that she feels that the guy she is dating will end up hurting her. She had listed his flaws such as hes in a fraternity and he smiles weed everyday. I felt good to get a phone call from her friend. She had also told me that even tho she knows shes gonna end up hurt she wants to take a risk anyways. She still talks about me and asks about me, but what i have been doing is just focusing on myself as hard as it has been. But as much as i care for her and love her, i have to learn to let her go. Like you said she is young, i just wish things would have happened a bit different. Just knowing shes in another guys arm, kills me. But im going to take this time in working on myself. Because at the end of the day, the most important person in your life is yourself. And who knows maybe well end up together again in the future. Thank you for hearing me out April.

[jcao226]

When i said control, i didnt mean like hey do this or else kinda thing. I meant it in way of moving things in an alternate direction for once. Because majority of the time i pick her up ON HER TIME, I take her home ON HER TIME. I guess you can say i would like to see if she is willing to go out of her way to see me, or talk to me on my time this time. Yesterday she had been texting me quite often and more detailed than usual. And surprisingly at night, she asked to talk on the phone. Im glad she wanted to because its one of the things i miss the most. i probably haven’t talk to her on the phone for about a month. Yesterdays plan did not work, my plan was to see if she would go out past 5:30 to see me. Al though she did not come out because she went somewhere with her sister, i got the impression she did want to see me and talk to me from reading her text messages. im hoping i get to see her today.

[jcao226]

Thank you very much for you response. It does make alot of sense. Although i shouldnt be mopping around about it, it does hurt me. But i did not talk to her for 4 days, she had came back to me and texted me, only i did not respond right away. im starting to change things up, and hopefully my goal is to get her back and hopefully she realizes that dating might not even be for her. i understand you said i cant control when or if she wants to date, but im just hoping that after her first experienced, it will be her last. At the same time i have not closed the door to her, i care about her deeply, and will stick around. Only now i am trying to take control of the relationship. Majority of the time i take her home when she tells me to, but changing things up, i told her i had to go somewhere, and i made her work for my affection and attention which left her wanting more the next day. While we were in bed, she gave me a sincere hug that i havent felt in awhile. I feel confident that we will make it through this. Even though she tried to break up with me, she came back to me. Changing things up seems to be working, and i hope it does. Most times i usually take her home at 5:30, today i told her i was busy until 5 or 5:30, now im seeing if she does really want to see me, she will go out of her way to go out past that time to see me. It will show me that she went out of her way because she wanted to and not because she had to. I think the hardest part for me was changing things up and trying to take control, instead waiting on her time. As much as i wanted to see her longer, and i could tell she wanted to see me longer, i cut it short, so she could want more the next day or maybe even the whole week. Because i do want her wanting more from me. But once again, thank you very much for your insight. I really appreciate it.

[jcao226]

opps, this is my post, i forgot to log in before i press submit. sorry.

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