[April Masini, your AskApril]

Did I hear you ask if this is the right place? 😄 Well, sweetie, there is no better place.

I’m gonna get you that damsel,

But before I can do that, I want the full picture.

Tell me about your dream woman. What does she look like? What are her hobbies? What does she do for work? What’s her social status? I need to know if she’s spiritually grounded or if she’s the type who prefers a different kind of connection. What’s her ambition? And yeah, where does she live?

And I want to know all that about you too. How do you see yourself? Don’t be shy. Give me the full rundown.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You keep saying “we love each other.” But dear you only know how you feel, you can’t be so sure of what he feels. The only way to know if he loves you is by what he does.

But you’re right about something, you both want each other, Except, not for the same reason.

You want him because you love him, but him, on the other hand, wants you because he can control you, manipulate you, cross every boundary in the world and you would still find an excuse for him.

There are too many “we”s in your story for someone whose reality of this relationship is totally different from yours.

You say you don’t want to lose him, yet you don’t want to keep getting hurt. That’s like sticking your hand in a fire and hoping not to burn. Newsflash: fire burns.

Being disrespectful, inconsiderate, neglectful, insensitive, and cheating, that’s who he is. Those traits come with the package. If you choose him, you’re choosing all of that. You don’t get to pick the parts you like and skip the rest.

So if you really want a better life, you already know what to do. Walk away before he burns what’s left of your self-worth.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

He thought he could handle you going to that concert with your ex, big mistake😂

I’m sure he said yes to look cool and unbothered, but deep down, it was eating at him.

Then he probably told his friends about it, and they laughed, called him weak, told him he was being played, and boom, now his ego is bruised all because of you. So, he’s turned the embarrassment into anger towards you.

This isn’t a “talk it out on the phone” situation. You need to see him, either he comes to the concert, or you go home. The longer you stay out there, the more that shame and jealousy stew inside him, and the messier it’ll get.

When you see him, don’t start defending yourself. Just be direct. Tell him you’re sorry and you realized that going to the concert with your ex wasn’t smart and it won’t happen again. Then remind him you love him and that he’s your man.

All he really needs right now is reassurance.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Why are you trying to rebuild something you didn’t break?

Nothing you did damaged his trust, because he never trusted you in the first place. Your boyfriend isn’t being “protective.” He’s an insecure little boy pretending to be a man.

And deep down, you knew it. That’s why you lied about never having an orgasm, not because you’re dishonest, but because you knew the truth would crush his fragile ego. Same reason you deleted that male friend. You were managing his emotions instead of your own.

Let’s call it what it is, control and emotional abuse, not love or protection.

You can’t fix a man’s insecurity. He has to do that himself.

Then he called you “fat” during an argument? Ditch him now!

[April Masini, your AskApril]

News Bulletin: Not every man is chasing after young or model-perfect women.

Three Names: Prince Charles. Princess Diana. Camilla Parker Bowles.

Hello.

Who got the Prince?

Exactly.

Please do not misunderstand. Our appearance matters — a lot. And, especially in dating.

Now, before offering any suggestions, I need to understand a few things about you, like….

1) Are you in a city or in a rural area? And what is the approximate population

2) What is the nearest major city? How far away is it from you?

3) You said you’re “not financially stable.” What does that mean? Are we talking debt? If so, how much?

4) What kind of work are you doing right now?

5) What does very well educated mean — and in what field? (There is a specific reason for this question)

6) You also mentioned being overweight. How many pounds are we talking about?

7) What’s your day-to-day like? Do you have hobbies that you actually do, or just ones you like the idea of doing?

8) Please give me a picture of what your day-to-day life looks like….. I want to understand what you are (or are not) doing to open yourself up to meeting new people, specifically men.

About this man from 20 years ago, why are you so sure you can’t reconnect with him?

You don’t need to guess if he’s married; find out.
Look him up online.
Confirm he actually is married. Don’t simply write him off.
Where does he live now?

We will craft our How To Re-Enter the Dating Scene Guide for Sunny together once you fill in some empty blanks for me…(And do a bit of research on our friend, Mr 4/5” Too Short, 20 Years Ago) …. 🌻💛

[April Masini, your AskApril]

The only real sign someone wants to kiss you is when they actually lean in and try to kiss you. Everything else is guesswork. And out of all your choices, there’s really only one that guarantees things won’t get awkward for you, creating the moment while hoping he takes the hint.

One more tip, wear lip gloss. Men notice it. It draws their eyes and makes them want to kiss you even more.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

How do you stop the self-sabotage in the moment? Just stop! And apologize for being rude, he’s probably just trying to be nice and keep the workplace friendly.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Talk to him first. How’s he supposed to know what you want if you don’t say it? Then tell me what he says.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

“**Soulmate**” is supposed to be a shared experience something two people feel together. That’s clearly not what’s happening here.

You spent five weeks together and then she was gone for four months. A lot changes in four months, and it sounds like things did. Long-distance is hard enough when two people are solid, but you barely had time to build a foundation before the distance set in.

I’d like to know, what was the relationship like *before* you went to see her? My guess is, you already felt her slipping away, and you went there hoping to fix it. You gave up work, saved money, and made sacrifices to be with her, but she didn’t didn’t appreciate it.

You keep blaming your anxiety, your clinginess and not taking the lead, but that’s not why she left. That’s the story you tell yourself because you can’t face the truth:,you’ve idealized her. You’ve turned her into someone who can’t do wrong.

And I’ll tell you thee truth right now because I’m the only one who can tell you. something shifted during those months apart, and by the time you saw her again, the connection was gone.

And you said you’ve been broken up for two months. She’s already moved on.

All the work you’ve put into improving yourself won’t change her mind.

Instead of trying to win her back, focus on putting this new version of you out there for someone who actually deserves it and will value what you’ve done.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I’m actually glad you mentioned both your ages, because without that, I would’ve assumed you were both about thirteen.

It’s obvious he likes you, and you like him too, otherwise, you wouldn’t be asking these questions.

But let’s unpack what you said, “Should I ask him out, or keep letting him reveal himself slowly?”

He already did reveal himself, you just didn’t respond because you were embarrassed. So, what exactly are you confused about now? Why are you suddenly worried about whether he likes you or not?

That said, his behavior sounds like more than simple shyness. He might actually be on the spectrum. If that’s the case, and you’re no longer embarrassed by how he acts, then be honest and tell him you’ve accepted his offer. Stop overthinking it.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

She’s exploring, she’s having her fun, and doing what she thinks is best for her right now.

But what about you? Is what’s best for you really sitting around, waiting for her relationship to crash so you can step back in? Because if you do, you’ll just end up in the same loop, she’ll leave again the moment someone new catches her eye.

My honest advice? Remove yourself from this mess. Be friends if you must, but don’t fool yourself into thinking this can work romantically. You’ll only end up hurting yourself again, and you deserve better than to be someone’s backup plan.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I had to read your question a few times, and still couldn’t find one good reason you actually want to cohabitate with him. All I’m hearing is FEAR. FEAR of starting over, FEAR of being alone, FEAR of logistics. This doesn’t feel like a decision made from a place of excitement or love.

The main reason people move in together is because they want a deeper commitment. But from what you said, that’s actually what you’re scared of. You’re worried it’ll mess with your independence, and it definitely will. Moving in is giving up part of your freedom. If that idea scares you, then you’re not ready.

Think about it. If you weren’t relocating 18 hours from home, would you still move in with him right now? If the answer is “no,” then you know you’re jumping the gun. If the answer is “yes,” why haven’t you done it already?

Bottom line? You’re jumping the gun. Don’t confuse convenience with love. Wait until you actually want the commitment, not just a place to stay.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

There’s a very good chance his girlfriend deleted you. He probably mentioned you, and she picked up on what was going on, women usually do.

And let’s be honest, he didn’t mislead you. You read too much into his friendliness and built a story that wasn’t there. Nothing you’ve said shows that he’s romantically interested. If he wanted you, you’d know.

So just back off. Trying to turn this into more than a friendship will only make things awkward.

Keep your friendship. You’ll save your pride and your peace.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I think there’s more to this story than you’re saying.

If she said she’d see you at a specific time, it’s completely reasonable to check in an hour later to make sure everything’s okay. And if she’s having second thoughts, trust me, she’ll make that clear.

Also, what exactly do you mean by “I pushed too quickly” when this visit was her idea to begin with? You’re blaming yourself for something that doesn’t even make sense, except there is something you aren’t telling me.

Every single question you’re asking right now could be answered if you simply asked her directly. And none of them makes you seem desperate

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You already figured out the what matters the most when gifting. And even if you didn’t, I wouldn’t hand you a list of what to buy.

Since you know the emotion you want her feel, joy and warmth. Listen closely when you’re with her or when she talks about her day. Look for the moments that tell you what she needs. Then, step in with your gift.

[Member]

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