[89Lonely]

Thank you so much for all of your advice, it really is helping maintain a level head through all of this.

Breaking up hurts, and I think that is what I am most afraid of. It does hurt me to think about being without him, until the bad things start happening, because when things are good, they are great..but most of the time they aren’t very good. I know that this is what is best for my children and I, I just wish it didn’t have to be so difficult. I don’t want to hurt him, and I think that is what is bothering me the most, even though he doesn’t seem to feel bad when he hurts me by not coming home and things. I am working up the courage to be honest with him about how I feel. This may sound stupid, but I feel like the biggest thing that is holding me back is that he has no family here or anything, well besides his kids…but why am I so worried about where he will go, how he will make it, how he will manage to move into another place when he doesn’t have a job…I know it’s probably not my problem to worry about these things but I don’t necessarily want him on the streets or anything…I have an opportunity to move into a nice 3 bedroom place, the landlord is friends with my mom and she is willing to work with me as far as moving in, but she has stated that it is only for the kids and I, and the rent will be way cheaper then what I am paying now!! 🙂 It all seems so exciting, but when I think about where he will end up it makes me feel guilty…the closest family he has lives about 3 hours away..do I just leave that all up to him or should I offer to take him down there?

I am also afraid he is going to try to negotiate with me and say that we can end things and be done but I think he may want to try to live downstairs…right now it is his hangout place his “man cave” and it is basically an apartment down there, but that is not an option, we cannot continue living in the same house and remain broken up…we are supposed to talk today and once again I thank you for all of your advice…if you can’t tell this is just a really hard, life changing decision for me. One minute we were talking about marriage and now I am wanting to end things..everything you are telling me is giving me more and more strength to do what needs to be done!

[89Lonely]

Thank you for your advice, I understand that the relationship is affecting my children’s happiness as well. And I feel like I am ready to put things to an end. However, I am very nervous to bring up the subject to him. I have gone all this time pretending that everything is ok when it isn’t and I am afraid of the reaction I will get. Do you have any suggestions as far as how to go about bringing up the subject? How to try and end it in a civil way rather then an argument? I am not sure of the response he will give, and I am a little nervous about it. I know it will take him by surprise because as far as he knows everything is fine. Is there an easy way to do this? He has sooo many things, so when it does happen should I go stay somewhere while he is getting his things?? I am sorry for all of the questions, but I have never lived with anyone before and this decision seems like it is going to be a pretty devastating one. Should I talk with my kids? Or just let things play out?

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