[cappycap]

Thank you, April. You really hit the nail on the head when you said it would be making a mountain out of a molehill. We recently got into an argument about this again and I pretty much just let all my insecurities out. I don’t know why but I can’t help but compare our relationship to his past one. I always wonder if he was happier then, if they got along better etc. a lot of times I just don’t feel like our relationship isn’t genuine. Sometimes I feel like I only came about because she’s no longer here & I just happened to be more convenient. He had been dating other girls in high school & I happened to be out of high school & had my own car & money. He’s my first love, my first everything & I’m just second to him. I tend to over analyze things and I feel like that’s what I’m doing here but I don’t know how to stop 🙁

[cappycap]

Hi April,

So I finally met the man of my dreams! We are different yet alike. My family loves him & he is literally perfect to me. We have been together for almost a year, we are 2 weeks shy and I have a big problem. I love everything about him except for one thing… 6 months before we got together, his first love died. He was with her when she died and often struggles with guilt over what happened. After her death, he had various flings but nothing serious as he said he just wanted attention. He said it wasn’t until he met me that he decided to get into an actual relationship. At first he would still refer to his ex as his girlfriend and talk about her frequently. As the months passed he stopped and ended up deleting all pictures he had had of her and getting rid of most of the things she gave him or that had something of her. He still keeps a picture of her on his Instagram it just has her birthdate and date she passed. About 2 weeks ago he was browsing through my Instagram on my phone so I looked through his & found he had liked a picture of his ex that a friend of hers had posted. I asked him about it and he stated that he liked it as he felt bad for her friend. In the back of my mind I think he’s not completely over her and still loves her no matter how many times he tells me he doesn’t. It breaks my heart to think of him being in love with someone else as he is my first love & serious relationship. Even though I know she’s no longer here, I sometimes think that if she was I wouldn’t be here. I feel at this point he should get rid of anything having to do with her and stop liking pictures of her as it only makes me think he’s not over her. I’m a pretty jealous person and these thoughts are killing me & make me want to leave him. Although he truly is an amazing guy which makes it very difficult for me to do so. How should I be handling this situation? I figure I should add a bit more background information. He is 20 & I’m 22. His previous relationship lasted about 7 months and they had hit a rough spot around the time she passed and were trying to work things out.

[cappycap]

I figure I should add a bit more background information. He is 20 & I’m 22. His previous relationship lasted about 7 months and they had hit a rough spot around the time she passed and were trying to work things out.

[cappycap]

Thanks so much, April! I kind of figured it as I typed but you really put it into perspective for me. I appreciate it. 😀

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