[Sally]

It sounds like you’re trying to build something real, but she keeps giving other men space that should belong to your relationship. Anyone would feel frustrated hearing about another guy she cooks for, goes out with, and confides in. You’re not wrong for wanting clearer boundaries.

But here’s the thing, she’s showing you what she’s willing to give, and it might not be what you need. You can’t force someone to value your feelings the way you do. Tell her calmly what feels disrespectful, and if she still brushes it off, you may have your answer. Sometimes love just isn’t enough when respect is missing.

[Sally]

It sounds like he says all the right things but isn’t following through, and that’s what’s really bothering you. When someone’s serious, you can feel it in their actions, not just their words. Right now, he’s stalling, and that usually means there’s something he’s not saying, maybe money worries, fear of change, or he’s just not ready for the commitment that living together brings.

You’ve already shown you’re serious and ready to move forward. Give him a calm and honest talk where you ask what’s really holding him back. You deserve clarity, not confusion.

[Sally]

She sounds sweet on the phone, but if weeks keep passing and she never makes time to meet, that tells you something. When someone really wants to see you, they find a way, even if it’s just for a quick coffee. Excuses can sound caring, but they often hide hesitation or mixed feelings.

You’ve been patient and kind, and that’s great, but at this point, you’ve done your part. Stop chasing. Let her reach out next, and if she still doesn’t make it happen, then you’ve got your answer. Real interest shows through effort, not talk.

[Sally]

Oh wow, that sounds like one of those dates where you realize halfway through that you’re not on the same page at all. You showed up wanting to connect, and he showed up acting like it was all about him. That’s not being socially awkward, that’s just plain rude.

You deserve someone who notices you, listens, and tries to make the night enjoyable for both of you. The good thing is, now you know early what kind of effort he gives, which is none. Don’t waste your energy wondering what you did wrong. You didn’t. He just wasn’t it.

[Sally]

You’re not crazy for being angry. You’ve been giving and bending and waking up at 6 a.m. for someone who keeps showing you that you’re not a priority. That kind of love starts to eat away at your self-worth, even when the person says they care.

She might love you in her own way, but love that keeps you anxious and guessing isn’t healthy love. You can’t keep proving your worth to someone who should already see it.

You’re not selfish for wanting effort, affection, or honesty. That’s what being in a relationship means. You just sound tired. And when love starts to feel like work you’re doing alone, it’s okay to step back. Sometimes walking away isn’t giving up. It’s choosing peace.

[Sally]

I can tell you really care about her, and it’s good that you see how serious this is. But you need to face the truth because love alone can’t fix what’s been broken here. When anger turns physical, it’s not just a mistake, it’s harm, and no one deserves that. You can’t focus on getting her back right now. You have to focus on getting help.

You need to step away and find someone professional to work with, like a counselor or anger management program. Change takes time and real effort, not promises. If you truly love her, give her space to heal and work on becoming someone safe for her and for yourself.

[Sally]

I get why you’re feeling this way. You’re not being selfish, you’re just seeing the gap between where you are in life and where he is. You’re working hard, planning for your future, and wanting someone who matches that energy. That’s not asking too much. It’s just wanting a partner who’s growing beside you, not holding you back.

He sounds lost, and maybe he’ll figure things out, but you can’t be his motivation forever. You’ve already tried to help, and it’s okay to want more than potential. Love is supposed to make you feel supported, not drained. It’s not wrong to outgrow someone.

[Sally]

I understand where you’re coming from. When someone’s words don’t match their actions, it’s easy to doubt them. She might not be lying, she just sounds overwhelmed and trying to hold her life together. People in that kind of mess sometimes say what feels right in the moment to avoid awkwardness. You’re not wrong for being cautious. Trust your gut, but don’t assume the worst yet. Give her space and watch what she does, not what she says. If she calls, see where it goes. If she doesn’t, that silence will tell you everything you need to know.

[Sally]

That kind of friendship can really mess with your head. You care about her, and that’s real, but it’s also scary because you don’t know if she feels the same. The closeness feels good, but it’s starting to hurt a little too, right? You two talk a lot, but no romantic move has happened, and if she wanted something more, she probably would’ve made it clear by now.

It’s like watching a movie where the tension builds but the story never quite shifts, and you keep waiting for “the moment,” but it stays just out of reach. Sometimes people stay in your life because they need the comfort, not because they want the romance. Honestly, it might be time to just ask her where she stands. Better to know than to keep guessing and driving yourself crazy.

[Sally]

That sounds really hard. You’re trying to untangle a marriage, keep your job, and hold on to something new, all at once. No wonder it feels messy.

Adam’s probably scared about losing his job, and fear can make people pull away even when they still care. It’s not that his feelings are gone, he’s just protecting himself. But right now, the smartest thing you can do is focus on finishing your divorce and keeping things calm at work.

Once that’s settled, you’ll see more clearly if he’s still there and if it’s worth the risk. Love and work don’t always mix easily, especially when an ex is in the same place. Let time sort it out a bit before you try to fix everything at once.

[Sally]

That makes sense. When someone pulls back after making you feel safe, it shakes your trust. You’re not wrong for feeling unsure.

It sounds like you both are trying to make things better, and that’s good. But trust takes time to feel solid again. Try to focus on how he treats you now, not what he said before.

Let his actions show you if he’s really in it. You don’t have to forget what happened, just stop letting the fear control you. Real love feels steadier when you stop waiting for it to fall apart.

[Sally]

Yeah, I get how much that hurts. When someone pulls away like that, it messes with your head because you keep wondering what you did wrong. But honestly, it sounds like he’s already checked out and doesn’t want to say it out loud. Nobody who wants to keep something real treats you like you’re a burden.

You shouldn’t have to beg for attention or ask to be loved the way you were before. If he’s acting cold, ignoring your calls, and blaming you for things that don’t make sense, that’s not love, it’s control.

I know it’s hard to let go, but stop chasing him. Give him space and focus on what you need. If he cared the way you do, he’d show up. You deserve someone who actually wants to be there, not someone you have to convince.

[Sally]

Yeah, I get that. You love him and want to be what he’s been for you, but it’s hard when you feel like your worlds are so different. The truth is, you don’t need to have all the answers. You just need to show him you care and that you’re not going anywhere.

When life hits hard, people don’t always want advice. They just want someone to sit with them in it. Let him talk when he’s ready, listen without trying to fix it, and let him know it’s okay if he still leans on other friends too. That’s not a failure on your part. It’s just being human.

You’re learning, and that’s what matters. Love isn’t about being equally experienced. It’s about showing up even when you don’t fully understand.

[Sally]

Yeah, I get that. It sounds like you both trust each other and just want things to feel more comfortable. The truth is, the pill is really effective when you take it right, but no birth control is 100 percent. What matters here isn’t just the numbers it’s how safe you both feel.

If he’s nervous, don’t rush it. Talk it through when things are calm, not in the moment. Let him know you understand his worry and that you’d never pressure him. Maybe suggest trying it once and seeing how you both feel after.

Confidence comes from feeling respected, not convinced. When he feels heard, he’ll relax into it naturally.

[Sally]

Yeah, that’s rough. You care about her, but she’s caught between feelings and fear. That kind of mixed space can mess with your head.

You’ve done enough trying. Step back, breathe, and let her show if she really wants you there. If she does, you’ll know. If not, you’ll still have peace and that’s worth more than guessing where you stand.

[Member]

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