[Lune David]

AskApril, this advice is tough, but it’s real — and he needed to hear it.

Six months of dating and he still feels unsure? That already says a lot. If you really love a person, you won’t let them think that they are only good for “one meeting a week.” It should be nice and clear, not hard to understand, the way love is supposed to be.
Your explanation that she isn’t doing anything bad at all but she is just not giving enough was very clear to me and I really liked it. Moreover, it sometimes hurts even more because it is more difficult to leave a person who is “nice” but not really there.

“Do not settle for mediocrity” was indeed the most appropriate one. The feeling of being wanted should be for everyone, not just being tolerated.

In my point view: if someone really wants you, you won’t have to beg for their time.

[Lune David]

AskApril, I love how you always keep it classy but real. This advice is smooth, not messy.

The gift was cute, but you’re right — the real magic is in not chasing the moment. Letting him make the next move keeps the vibe confident, not thirsty. Gratitude hits harder when it’s timed right.

And I loved how you read his personality through the gift. Generous, creative, a little bold way more interesting than basic flowers.

Honestly, this is the kind of advice that saves people from overthinking and over-texting. Sometimes the sexiest move is… doing nothing at all.

[Lune David]

This situation would confuse and hurt anyone. After four years of hearing that his marriage was over, seeing him suddenly plan a vacation with his wife would shake any woman. Even if it is for the child, it is still painful when it is not talked about openly.

You are not wrong for feeling upset. You are not overthinking. You just want to know where you stand in his life.

The hard truth is that when someone is still married, their spouse will always have a place in their life in some way. That does not mean he is a bad person, but it does mean the relationship will always feel uncertain.

AskApril is right — now the choice is about what you can accept and what you cannot. You deserve honesty, clarity, and peace, not confusion and quiet fear.

April i want to ask question to you that
How does someone love a married partner without slowly hurting themselves in the process?

Thank you for always giving clear and kind guidance.

[Lune David]

Okay THIS is exactly why people come to April
Not for fairy dust — for cold, clean truth.

I’m not an expert here, just someone reading this and nodding way too hard. April didn’t even need paragraphs — one sentence and boom: “You’re dating a married man who isn’t divorced because he doesn’t want to be.” That’s it. Mic drop. #askapril

What got me is how much work you’ve been doing — moving houses, driving an hour, cooking, adjusting, compromising while he’s been, emotionally buffering between you, his ex, and his adult kids like a human Wi-Fi extender.

The ex isn’t the real problem. The son isn’t the real problem. The real problem is that he’s comfortable exactly where he is. No deadlines. No pressure. No consequences. Why rush a divorce when everyone else rearranges their life for you?

April’s advice hits because it doesn’t insult him. it empowers you. Either accept the full package as-is, or choose something different. But waiting for him to magically wake up in January with motivation, boundaries, and a backbone? Yeah… that’s hoping, not planning.

Also, side note: commitment ceremony while still married is wild. That’s not moving forward, that’s decorating a parked car and calling it a road trip.

If nothing changes by January, it’s probably not fear — it’s preference. And April clocked that perfectly.

[Lune David]

Honestly, this is why I like April’s advice so much. She never pushes fantasy or games — she always brings things back to self-respect and reality. That’s why this forum feels safe. 💛 #askapril

JB, reading your post, I don’t think you’re paranoid at all. Anyone in your place would pause and wonder what’s really going on. You didn’t rush into anything, you built a friendship first, and that matters.

What would bother me too is how the communication shifted after you slept together. The “come get some more” text can feel confusing, not because it’s wrong, but because it doesn’t answer the bigger question of where you stand.

I like that you’re not chasing him or blowing up his phone. That shows confidence. Just make sure you’re not shrinking your feelings to keep his interest. Being patient is fine ignoring your own discomfort isn’t.

Curious to hear April’s take on this, especially when someone’s life is busy but your emotions are still real.

[Lune David]

Oh sweetheart… this isn’t a love story anymore, this is an emotional roller coaster you’ve been stuck on since you were fourteen.

You didn’t lose “the love of your life.” You lost a boy who loved the way you loved him, but didn’t know how to protect, respect, or choose you. And that hurts more than hatred ever could.

He didn’t change overnight.
He slowly showed you who he really was. The cheating, the lies, the back-and-forth, the using you for comfort while chasing someone else that wasn’t a phase. That was his character at that time in his life.

You’re not crazy for missing the old him. You’re grieving the version of him that felt safe. But that version doesn’t exist anymore.

And listen carefully:
A man who blocks you, tells you to stop texting, and says he used you is not confused — he’s done. And I know that sentence hurts, but it also sets you free.

You didn’t lose because you weren’t enough.
You lost because you loved deeper than he could.

The reason you can’t let go isn’t because he’s your future. it’s because he was your first. And first loves imprint hard. But they are not meant to define your whole story.

April is right. Paris isn’t just a place, it’s a chance to become someone new. Someone who isn’t begging to be chosen by a boy who couldn’t even choose himself.

He may one day regret losing you. But by then, I promise, you won’t be waiting.

You’re not broken.
You’re healing.
And one day you’ll look back and realize this heartbreak was the doorway to a stronger, softer, wiser version of you.

Let him be a memory.
Let yourself be the future.

[Lune David]

This one hurts because it’s the classic “almost something” that never becomes anything and those are the hardest to let go of.

Here’s the blunt truth: he didn’t disappear because you did something wrong. He disappeared because he was never fully in. A man who is interested doesn’t stand you up, doesn’t text out of obligation, and doesn’t go silent when you close the door with grace. Silence is an answer — just not the one we want.

You didn’t waste four months because you’re foolish. You wasted four months because you were hopeful. Big difference.

You treated him with maturity, softness, and respect. He responded with convenience and emotional laziness. That mismatch isn’t your failure — it’s your lesson.

April is right: three dates in four months isn’t a relationship. It was potential, chemistry, and fantasy filling in the gaps. And we all do that when someone feels special. But reality showed itself in the behavior — late, last-minute, inconsistent, and finally… gone.

The part that stings most isn’t that he didn’t choose you. It’s that he didn’t even bother to close the chapter properly. And honestly? That tells you everything about the quality of man he was.

You didn’t lose him.
You lost an idea.
And you gained clarity.

Next time, the moment a man disrespects your time, you walk, not because you’re angry, but because you’re valuable.

And let’s be real: the right man won’t make you write a thesis trying to decode him. He’ll make you feel chosen.

You didn’t fail at dating.
You just leveled up.

[Lune David]

Oof… this one stings because it’s painfully real.

Long-distance only works when both people choose effort, not when one person is waiting and the other is “processing” in silence. The moment you went through something traumatic was the moment he should’ve stepped up and instead, he emotionally clocked out. That’s not a small detail. That’s the whole story.

You’re not asking for too much. You’re asking for consistency, reassurance, and presence. And right now you’re getting anxiety, silence, and emotional crumbs.

April is right — three months is still new, but that doesn’t mean your feelings are wrong. It just means you’re seeing the truth early instead of years later. And honestly? That’s a gift, even if it hurts.

The scariest part isn’t that he’s distant. It’s that you’re already shrinking your needs to keep him comfortable. Love isn’t supposed to feel like tip-toeing around someone’s emotional availability.

If he comes for the holidays and the energy still feels forced… believe that. Chemistry doesn’t need obligation.

You don’t miss him — you miss the version of him that made you feel wanted.

in my point of view a relationship shouldn’t feel like waiting for someone to remember they love you.

[Lune David]

Girl… if he likes you any harder, he’s going to need a campus permission slip.

Let’s be honest — he’s not acting like a “just a friend.” He’s acting like a boyfriend who’s too scared, too confused, or too polite to say the word. Holding your hand in the dark, skipping concerts, screaming sorry from a hostel, getting jealous over exes AND puppies? That’s not friendship — that’s emotional attachment with extra seasoning.

But here’s the twist April nailed perfectly: the real confusion isn’t him. It’s you.

You’re reading every signal from him with a microscope while still not knowing if you even want him. And when a girl is unsure, a guy usually mirrors that energy. He’s probably thinking, “She treats me like her person… but never claims me.”

The college “taken” rumor? That’s not a curse — that’s just proof your vibe together is loud.

My spicy take? He likes you. You like the attention. And both of you are standing at the edge waiting for the other to blink first.

So before asking what’s in his head… maybe ask what’s in your heart. Because until you choose, he’ll stay in that safe, confusing middle with you.

And honestly? That middle is cute for a while… but it’s not where real stories stay.

April’s advice is gold. Play the field, own your curiosity, and stop letting one boy silently reserve you while you’re still undecided.

Because you’re not lost and lonely, girl… you’re just standing in between chapters.

[Lune David]

MissChris, breaking up during the holidays is like trying to return a gift while everyone is singing carols awkward, emotional, and nobody knows where to stand.

But honestly? AskApril and a few others here said it best — there is no “perfect” time. Waiting just wraps a broken relationship in shiny paper and pretends it’s fine. That hurts more in the long run.

I love the idea of ending things with honesty and clean boundaries instead of fake New Year kisses and silent resentment. And the rebound advice? YES. January is for healing, not panic-dating your way into another mess.

Thank you, AskApril, for always reminding us that clarity is kinder than comfort. You don’t sugarcoat, but you don’t break hearts either — you teach people how to protect them.

If I ever break up during the holidays, I’m bringing your advice… and probably wine.

[Lune David]

This one really hits the heart. Losing your best friend while they’re still right there is a special kind of pain. You can feel how much you love her and how scared you are of breaking the family apart.

Thank you, AskApril, for not sugarcoating this but still giving real hope. The part about big changes, not small talk is so true. When distance builds for years, words alone don’t fix it — action does. Grand gestures aren’t about gifts, they’re about saying, “I see you, and I’m willing to fight for us.”

In my point of view: if she’s already asking for space, this is the moment where effort has to get loud and consistent. Not panic, not promises — real change she can feel.

Wishing this family strength, and thank you April for always pushing people to step up instead of giving up.

[Lune David]

Honestly… this whole thread is the classic “friend zone with holiday lights on it.” 😅
You like him, you’ve liked him, and deep down you know it, but you’re scared to rock the boat.

AskApril keeps it real (as always): if you stay in the friend lane forever, don’t be shocked when he never switches gears. You don’t need to chase, confess your soul, or ruin the friendship. but you do need to stop pretending you’re just his study buddy from the canteen.

Also, that “army timing” excuse? Been there. Timing doesn’t block interest — hesitation does.

In my point of view : you can’t keep the friendship exactly the same and magically get romance on top. Something has to shift, even a little.

Love how AskApril cuts through the confusion and says it straight — show interest, stop hiding, and let him either step up or stay put.

[Lune David]

That wasn’t ‘just chatting’ — that was flirting with a seatbelt on. Too many winks, too many invites, and way too much trying. If you’re with someone, you don’t go shopping for attention elsewhere. AskApril said it straight: the real question isn’t her, it’s why he was looking at all

[Lune David]

This is really sweet ❤️
You just want to make your boyfriend feel special, the same way he makes you feel special.

The simple truth is: it’s okay to give back. Just do it in a way that still feels like him being him. You’re not trying to “be the man,” you’re just saying thank you.

As AskApril explains, the best gifts are things he would enjoy, not things that replace what he already loves doing for you. A fun trip, a surprise he likes, or something just for him will make him feel happy and proud — not uncomfortable.

So yes, treat him, enjoy it, and don’t overthink it. Love is about giving, not keeping score.

[Lune David]

This is a holiday love story, not a life sentence
You’re 17 — you’re supposed to feel curious, playful, and a little confused. If your heart wants to fly but your brain feels stuck, that’s your sign to slow down.

He can be sweet, kind, and “perfect,” and still not be your perfect right now. You don’t need to break up today, and you don’t need to promise forever either. Just chill, meet him, and see how you feel — not how everyone else feels.

If it feels fun, enjoy it.
If it feels heavy, let it go.

Free birds shouldn’t put themselves in cages — even golden ones

[Member]

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