If you want him to want you (repeat after me, “If you want him to want you….”) then you should try to entice him, not repel him. That old saying, you’ll catch more flies with honey than vinegar, applies here! I know that this is a little harder to do than simply pointing out what you don’t like him doing, but try to focus on what YOU can change in [u]your own[/u] behavior to make him want to see you more. In other words, you have to be that girlfriend that attracts guys. Flirting, enticing, making the time you’re together fabulous and the phone conversations or text and email exchanges romantic and sexy, are what you should be doing. I go into this way more in detail in the book I wrote for women, [b]Think & Date Like A Man[/b], [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], but in a nutshell here, you have to become the girlfriend he wants to see, not one who has to convince a guy to see her. You have to get him to chase after you, not run away from you. 😉
The problem here is that if you continue to complain and find fault with his going to the gym, you’re going to drive him away instead of pulling him closer. 😮 I think you’ve lost focus on what it is you want. From what you’ve written, it appears that you want to see him more, but …. instead of figuring out how to get him to WANT to see you more, you’ve focused on his gym habit as the problem and you’re trying to get him to go to the gym less. The big problem is that you may succeed at getting him to go to the gym less, and he may still not want to see you more, so let’s focus on what you really want, and how to get it. 😀
Finally, reconsider the discrepancy in the number of times a week you’d like to see him and the number of times a week he’d like to see you. I’m not sure how old the two of you are, or where you hope this relationship is heading (you may have a different outcome goal if you’re 18 than if you’re 58), but on the surface of what you wrote, if you’re seeing each other two to three times a week, regularly, this could be a very normal frequency for a healthy couple! There are many happy couples who see each other less frequently than that! And if you’re someone who needs more attention than you’re getting, and he’s not ever going to be that guy, you may want to reconsider your needs being met, and whether or not this is a deal breaker for you. Women who are with guys who travel for work, work long hours, more than one job, etc., see their men less often than you see your boyfriend. I’m not saying you’re wrong in wanting more — you’re not! But the real issue isn’t the number of times you see each other — it’s the compatibility you have with the frequency. If you were in agreement, one time a week could be fine. For some couples, it’s 14 times a week — the number isn’t the issue, it’s the compatibility on any number.
I hope that helps!
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