[Hopeful1967]

Hi,

How do you deal with someone who believes that they have a right to speak their minds whenever they want to? My divorce was finalized 7 months ago after nearly 2 years of dealing with my difficult ex dragging his feet and costing me thousands of dollars. It was ugly. My BF has helped me along the way…very loving and supportive…but he has very negative feelings towards my ex. My ex pays me child support, but gives me a hard time for any of the extra things that come up that we are required to share. There are many other situations that my ex makes very difficult for me and my BF has no patience for it.When my kids are around and they bring up their father, my BF does not hold back and lets the kids know how he feels about him.I have told him that it bothers me that he says things in front of the kids and he basically says that he won’t sugarcoat anything for the kids sake….thinks they should know what a jerk their dad is. I know how much my BF loves me…but he is an older man who has compromised a lot in his life and he refuses to let anyone dictate what he does anymore.
I love him very much….he is a good man who has been very good to my kids and me….other than this situation.
How do I handle this??
Thanks in advance,
Hopeful1967

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You have to dump him. 😕 Sorry. 😕 Your boyfriend is alienating the children from their father, and no matter how hard a time your ex-husband gives you or your boyfriend, his relationship with his children is important, and anyone who alienates children from a parent needs to be let go, pronto! You need to protect your kids from your boyfriend and make sure your kids know that their relationship with their father is important and that you won’t tolerate anyone denigrating him, no matter how you feel about him, personally.

You can do better. 😉

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