[Missy4545]

here it goes…
My boyfriend found out I was pregnant shortly after we broke up. We decided to get back together, and try to work things out. He was constantly talking about things he was going to do with the baby. Very excited. I made a mistake in telling him I wanted to get an abortion. He told me if I did that he would no longer speak to me. A few days later I noticed he was spending way to much time with his friends then me. And he was always telling me that he wanted to spend the night at his mom’s house, because he need some sleep.. I got mad and I asked him how he expected to have a baby if he was going to live with his mom. I feel bad. He told me he needed a break from this. and he would be back. I called him and he told me that I should get an abortion, that it would be stupid to have a baby. And when I told him I didn’t want to now. He told me he had to go, and would call me back. He never called back, he blocked me from any kind of communication. But yet he will not come get his stuff. Will he be back? What do you think he is doing? And how long should I wait before I move on?

[Missy4545]

It would be great to get some feedback on this issue!

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Your boyfriend doesn’t want to be with you, and he is conflicted at best about the baby, and doesn’t want you to have it, at worst. Don’t blame him. This was an unexpected pregnancy and it’s normal for him to be conflicted and/or not to want the baby and/or definitely want the baby. His feelings are going to be all over the map. However, [i]your[/i] feelings for the baby are separate from his.

It doesn’t sound like he’s coming back to you in any permanent way. He gave it a try for the sake of the pregnancy when he found out after your break up that you were having a baby. But it didn’t work. Don’t count on him coming back in any permanent way for you. You need to move on and prepare to become a single mother.

Try and keep your relationship with him civil and friendly since you will be co-parenting a child together. I know this is a tall order, but try.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the previous post. If you plan on keeping the baby you need to start making plans on raising it on your own. I doubt he will come back. It sounds like he tried making it work and his feelings didn’t change. I would let him be, give him time and he will call you. You can always extend an olive branch and ask him to doctors appointments and things of that nature. Keep a good relationship with him so he can be part of the babies life.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Guest, who posted, is correct. Regardless of his relationship with you, he will be this baby’s father, so having a cordial and even friendly relationship with him is important so that he can be in the baby’s life if not yours.

[Missy4545]

Sine then, we have spoke. He showed up at my house. Wanted to know what I wanted to talk about. I told him nothing anymore, and broke it off with him. Another question now for everyone, would be why does he say he is going to take all his stuff, and him not take it when he comes here?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

He says he’s going to take his stuff and then doesn’t because he’s lazy. My advice to you is to box it up and have it dropped off at his house. That way you can clear the path for a fresh start for yourself.

[Member]

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