[lilxmizxdanielle]

So..my situation is pretty complicated, at least I think. So I have known David for about 4 years now, and he’s always been known as some “player”. He has been chasing me for 4 years, wanting to be with me and i never gave him a chance…until about 3 months ago. He has always been in love with me and I finally gave him a chance. So things were great at first..but then he cheated on me with his ex girlfriend. I found out because I went through his text messages. I broke up with him, then took him back about a week later. It was just too early to let go. We compromised on a lot of things and I had him be a lot more open with me and we made it work out. It was going great, again, for the first couple of weeks. He would not lie to me, i always knew what he was doing and who he was with. then we started fighting a lot because I have a very hard time trusting him. I would always bring up the past and our fights would cause me to push him away and make our relationship weaker. Then, he cheated on me with another girl. I found out because her roomate forwarded me their emails to eachother. I think he cheated on me also one drunken night after we had a big fight, but i do not have proof, just accusing. I broke up with him and we did not speak for a couple of weeks. but we have the same friends, so we started seeing eachother when we hung out with our friends and started talking again. its hard to avoid him. He is still in love with me and knows what he did was wrong, and he wants to be with me. i think he doesnt know what he wants really, but he is trying to change to be with me. he has been in love with me for yearsss and everyone knows how much he wants me, but i do not have any trust for him at all. He is trying to date me right now, but I can not make up my mind whether i want to be with him or not… I do want to be with him because i care for him a lot and we are very close and we are very comfortable with eachother, but then i dont want to have to be hurt for the third time from him. He swears he is changing,and he does seem calmer, but it always starts out “great”, and then goes down hill. I am such a forgiving and caring person. I want to have that comfort again and i know he doesnt deserve me and that i am lowering my standards if I go back to him, but its hard to say no to something that you already know and want. I just need some advice, becaause everyone else is telling me NOOO DONT GO BACK TO HIM, and i know i shouldnt, but i do want to. i guess im hoping things will change.

[Anonymous]

wow you should have your answer riht there. he cheated on you plenty of times and you are still curious? you are never going to be able to trust him. how could he cheat on you that many times and you still took him back!n after the first time it shouldnt have ever happened ag ain!

[Ask April Masini]

Pay attention to behavior — not feelings. If you do, you’ll see that after dating someone for three months, he’s cheated on you twice that you know about and once that you’re not certain of. You’ve broken up, fought and now are considering taking him back because….you say you want comfort. 😕 And you’re a considerate person?? 😯

Wake up! This guy isn’t right for you. You’re trying to pretend he’s someone he isn’t. If you’d just look at his record of cheating monthly on you, and fighting and his [i]trying[/i] 😮 not to lie to you, you’d see he’s not a good boyfriend for you. There is nothing considerate about continuing to put yourself in harm’s way, so stop fooling yourself that you’re doing the right thing or the kind thing by taking him back. It’s just plain old dumb.

Move on, and find someone who brings you TRUE comfort not fantasy comfort. A guy who cheats on you monthly isn’t Mr. Right. Sorry, but your friends are right.

[lilxmizxdanielle]

thanks! what is a good way to move on?

[povidiu]

Many times the womans are trying to pretend that the boy is someone he isn’t, Actually this is just a reflection of her idea of man on reality.

[Ask April Masini]

The best way to move on is to first of all, buy my book at this link, [url]http://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url] and read it this weekend! Think & Date Like A Man is a book for women who aren’t getting what they want in their relationships. It shows them how TO get that Mr.Right, so read this book first and foremost.

At the same time, focus your energy on yourself. If you have too much free time you’re going to focus it on whatever comes to mind first, and in this case, it’s the wrong guy, so stay busy. Exercise, get a second job, volunteer, become involved in local or state politics, get a makeover, clean your closet, redecorate your home, adopt a pet — recreate your own life so that the spotlight is on YOU and YOU are the star of your own show. This will set the stage for a bigger, better boyfriend — which you WILL GET if you read my book and act on it’s advice.

I hope that helps! 😀

[Author]

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