[Anonymous]

Ok not sure where to start, I left my husband and got a divorce because I was unhappy. I also have 2 children. I re-connected with my first high school boyfriend, and things of course were great. He even moved in pretty quickly with me. He was a great help to my kids and all etc. Given I was going through a lot of emotional distress with work and personal issues a lot of it was naturally directed towards my boyfriend.

Everything seemed fine, but i noticed in the last weeks, I asked for some time to myself. So he left and soon after I realized, I was completely miserable and alone without him. After the first week of him leaving we had plans to go to the city with my kids and last minute, I thought it was better to just do shopping him and myself. He said he was upset I changed it to some ‘date like’ thing.

anyways the strangeness continued and I saw him for maybe 2 hours the next day and the following date he said he needed space. After not contacting him for several days he contacted me, and even babysat my child.

We just went to dinner and a movie recently but i feel like this is all hopeless because he said most of the reasons he left was because i was a little pushy…overbearing and not so nice to him at the end before he moved out

I would love to make this work and be able to restart, does anyone know what is the right thing to do in this situation? I just want him to return to his normal self as well as me.

He is still very attracted to me, but I want us to go back to the emotional happiness we shared almost a year ago.

He just seems somewhat distant and occasionally his regular self returns. He said I need to relax and focus on the important stuff in my life.

Also I take it as a personal offense that he just refuses to go back to my apartment with me, or is this something I should NOT focus on so much?

He is more then willing to watch my daughter for when i need to attend premieres and events, but only at his sisters where he is staying. he lived with me 8 months.

I want to be able to fix this and go back to where/how we were as a couple. But If anyone seems to think this is a doomed relationship I wont fight or try anymore.

I am taking too much personal…the fact he wont come to my apartment (although I live 40 min away). and he doesnt seem to want to make plans new years eve.

last week. I asked is he thought this was fixable…”he said yes”. Not sure…if he still feels that way after a week.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I can’t tell if this is completely doomed or not because it doesn’t appear there is clear communication on what he wanted from you to begin with and what caused the break up.

One of the reasons I suggest all the tips and advice in Think & Date Like A Man, is because THEY WORK! 😆 When you moved in with him “quickly” you didn’t really get to know him or his intentions very well and it isn’t clear what yours were either. From what you describe in your post, it still isn’t clear what you want from him except for him to be “his old self”, but he’s saying he thinks you’re too pushy.

My advice is not to try and create something that doesn’t exist. Instead, buy and read Think & Date Like A Man. Here’s the link: [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url]. It’s going to help you a lot in this relationship — and all others that come your way.

Please follow me, as well, @AskAprilcom (no dot!) on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 😀

[Member]

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