[Allen]

Hi April,

My name is Allen. I’m 22, and I need your honest opinion no sugarcoating.

Why do some people say they “feel a strong connection,” act close, open up emotionally, and then disappear the moment things start getting real?
One minute they’re invested, the next they pull away like commitment is something dangerous.

Is that fear — or is it just enjoying the benefits without wanting the responsibility?

And how can you tell the difference between someone who is truly confused about their feelings and someone who just likes the attention but never planned to stay?

Because right now, modern dating feels less about building something real and more about who exits first without looking bad.

I’d really appreciate your straight-up perspective.

[Melanie Beck]

Hello Allen,

It’s true Todays Generation is not value what true love is , love becomes a game for them

People fear about commitments and to take any responsibilty, they believe in easy way that is to step up or to leave the person and move on to the next is the easiest way to get rid of from any commitments.

And you’re right about modern dating. A lot of people treat exits like image management, staying just long enough to feel good, leaving before they’re responsible for anything real.

If you really want to know difference between someone who is truly confused about their feelings and someone who just likes the attention but never planned to stay

Here are a few questions for you to sit with:

1. When they pulled away, did their words still match their actions?
2. Did clarity scare them, or did it inconvenience them?
3. Were you building something together, or were you carrying most of the emotional weight?
4. If nothing changed, would you feel secure staying?

The right people don’t make connection feel like a trap.
They make it feel like something worth choosing, even when it’s uncomfortable.

And if you’re tired of half-people and soft exits, that’s not bitterness.
That’s discernment.

If you need another Prospective then Ask April

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Hi Allen

Before I can help you, I need you to clarify a few things.

You said “One minute they’re invested” What’s YOUR definition of “invested”? How many dates does it take before you consider someone invested? Two? Five? Twenty?

Then you said, “Is it just enjoying the benefits without wanting the responsibility?” What do you see as the benefits they’re enjoying, and how do you think they’re dodging the “responsibility” part?

And lastly, you said “They pull away like commitment is dangerous.” How many dates equal commitment for YOU?

Your answers will give me the insight I need to help you

[Member]

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