[plzh3lp]

I met a guy in school who I thought was cute but we never talked and asking him today, he hardly remembers me. I added him on facebook while going to school together. I saw he was online once and we talked for some time about guy and girl problems. We didnt talk again till about two years later. I accidentally messaged him on facebook one drunk night saying I thought he was cute. In the morning I apologized and went on with my life. Thinking hed forgive me and move on with his life too..never to talk to me again….to my surprise he asks me how I am….from that day on we’ve talked every single day. Its been almost more than a month now of talking everyday and the majority of the time we text back and forth till 3 in the morning. (All convo has been text only). I am usually never the one to text him first and I only have texted him first a few times. We talk about everything….our interests, family life, work, etc. Whenever he brings up a topic that remotely has anything to do about sex…I usually never respond back or maybe flirt a little but if he takes it too far…I stop texting. He always starts the convos by asking “What I’m doing” or “How has my day been”.. I feel like he must like me since he texts me everyday but he has never once expressed any feelings of liking towards me…..he also rarely compliments me. He hasnt talked at all about meeting up and I’m unsure where he stands. I guess its only been a month but my phone is full of thousands and thousands of texts from him and i feel like i know him so well. We also havent exactly talked to each other in person even when we went to school together. So it’s kind of an online relationship where I really haven’t met or hung out with the guy. So what I’m asking is: what do you think his intentions are? do you think he likes me? I dont want to make the first move so what should I do? when will he want to meet?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Good questions! 🙂

First of all, understand that what you want is a real life relationship with a boyfriend. Once you know that, it’s important to focus on that and steer clear of anything that isn’t that.

You’ve got a one-month old relationship with a guy that is all online, so my first piece of advice is to not be so available online. If he really wants to be in contact with you, he’ll miss you and try to see you some other way. But if he doesn’t, then you have to understand that he isn’t interested in a real life relationship.

I hear from lots of men and women in similar situations to yours, and I always advise them not to conduct the entire relationship online because if you do, you’ll never know if he or she wants you off line! In some cases the men or women are so desperate to have the contact that they hold out hope that the relationship will miraculously become an off line one. Usually, it doesn’t.

It’s very important for YOU to not get sucked into a relationship you don’t want — one where the guy doesn’t ever ask you out in real life, so limit your online contact to once or twice a week, for only ten minutes each time, and if he doesn’t ask you out, then it’s time to move on. 😉

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