[Helena21]

Hello theremy name is Helena, i’m 22 and I’m new here… I’d like some of your time to tell me what you think about my ‘tricky’ situation. So here’s the deal. There’s this boy in my life that is into me for 15 years now… He’s always been telling me how he feels about me and he always said he wanted to be with me but I never really gave him a chance even though I kinda liked him too. I can’t really figure out why I didn’t give him a try, something was just holding me back. A few days ago that I saw him again he still seemed very interested in me…like..[b]very[/b] !! Plus he told me again, it wasn’t plain flirting….It was love confession once again ! But……this time, the thing is he is in a relationship for over a year now. At first I thought I wouldn’t do anything since a) I must have not given him a chance because maybe i’m not so into him and b) because of his girlfriend. However, I changed my mind, probably because the girlfriend situation got me intrigued. But still don’t know whether I should do something with him… I mean I’m wondering if he wants something casual or if he has serious feelings for me as he always claimed he had. I fear that those feelings might have gone away now and he wants something casual, which is something i’m in no way interested in !!! Still, I can’t believe that feelings of 15 years could have just gone away… I mean it’s like a whole life ! What does he want in your opinion and what should I do ??

[April Mașini, your AskApril]

If he’s been rebuffed by you for many years, he probably doesn’t expect you to be interested in dating him, any more. If you’re now truly interested in dating him, you need to let him know by saying something like, “If you weren’t in a relationship, I’d be ready to go out with you, now!” He then has a clue that you’re ready, if he is.

If he breaks up with his girlfriend to date you, that’s one way he can show you he’s really interested in having a serious relationship with you. If he wants to cheat on his girlfriend with you, then you’ll know that that’s what he’s got in mind. But it sounds like it’s up to you to give him a clue that you’re not going to turn him away again after all these years if he comes up with a genuine offer that works for you. 😉

Let me know how things go, and please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[Helena21]

Thanks so much for this approach April.. I thought too that he wouldn’t expect me to be interested any more now than I was every other year he approached me…But the fact that he still made this love confession to me, I think it shows he still has a hope inside him that I might want him someday. I just don’t want this to be just a fantasy inside his head and nothing more…He always claimed to have serious feelings and be in love but you know how these things work…Sometimes we think we want something and when we conquer it, we move on.. .. 🙁

[April Mașini, your AskApril]

The good news is that you seem to understand the situation and you’re going into it with your eyes open. 🙂

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