[mrstee]

Hi I’m new to the website but from reading the posted blogs it sounds like you are very knowledgeable with almost any relationship situation. I am 19 years old in college right now and I have been talking to this guy who is 21 in college also. We are the same major so we take a lot of the same classes and this is how we became friends. I had a crush on him so I made the first step and ended up being his tutor. We study together,share assignments and I tutor him occasionally. When we get together we have fun, laugh, drink sometimes and are really relaxed. It has been eight months and I have started to get feelings for him and begin to think about us moving past just friends. Sooo now the complicated parts..Right now we are friends with benefits meaning we do have sex with each other and I always spend the night (he’s the only guy I am sleeping with..it appears I’m the only one he sleeps with too but i can’t be certain),he has a 13 month son, and we both have never full out said we like each other. We both work..I’m involved in so many things on campus and he takes care his son most weekends so time together is not often. I know he feels something for me too but I know he doesn’t know how to say it just like me. I’m not really sure where to go from here to let him know I think we should be more then friends (like maybe go on a date or something?). Its only been eight months and I don’t want to rush anything and ruin everything cause I really like him. I also know when you start putting titles on relationships things become complicated. I know this post is a little vague but can you please help guide me in some sort of direction. Thank you!!!

[April Mașini, your AskApril]

You’ve already passed the friends level, but unfortunately, you made a mistake by becoming friends with benefits before finding out if he even wants to date you, and now, eight months down the line, you suddenly want a date. 😕 From his point of view he has no incentive to take you out, and frankly, he’s not interested in dating. If he was, he’d ask you out already. At age 21, with a son and a college education underway, trust me — he knows how to ask a woman out on a date if he wants to.

I suggest you read Think & Date Like A Man, [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], so you have a better understanding of how to get a man — and keep him. Being the one who chases the guy never works, and being friends with benefits goes against the principles I suggest to get a man to want you and only you!

Read the book and let me know if it helps.

In the meantime, please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter.

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