[Sylvia59]

April, reading the forums and talking to you has brought me to be myself again. You see my marriage goes way back April I was 15 yrs old when we met. By time HS ended we went different ways even states. Then he looked for me in Calif. I was 23 . We got together again ,and he had a girlfriend. 2 weeks later I left Calif moved to Fl and we were married. We went on vacation every 6 months or every year date night was when we were off. And him being a Deputy on midnights 24 yrs took a toll on both of us . But we were the type of couple that kissed every morn , held each other being romantic wasn’t an issue. Now 3 years hes on day shift , but time with each other was disappearing. I tried to change it . But in November I notice a change in him . I mention it to our son he’s 23 and he thought I was crazy. Then I found the phone calls . It’s now been almost 3 weeks since and writing to you reading forums makes me get through this . Now we’re Back to our lunch together every weekend , beach , walks etc. I read and hear of the ugly truth in cheating that includes, sex and couples treating each other so bad it breaks my heart. My husband see’s right through me , and he knows I still think about this mess. And Im looking at him now outside and remembering why I fell in love with him . He has moved on and hopes I have . I have too or I’ll kill this great marriage. Like you mention April this was one time of this episode. And in my heart I know it won’t happen again . I love him too much and respect what we have together . My lips only fit with his . Sounds stupid right ? We are planning our usual trip away together soon . Thank you for your time and ears and for all of you out there listen to your heart, be strong and never settle for less in life .and please listen to April she’s telling like it is .

[Sylvia59]

Niniko, Trusting is suppose to be easy. I’m married 27 years , my husband was looking for a different conversation than with me , men need attention just like us. “”you look handsome today , that shirt looks good on you , etc especially when you get older. And he does maybe I didn’t say it enough. We stop going out together on weekends and did nothing. We needed to spice up of life together. So everyday the trusting is better. I have to improve and be a better wife , I think all day what I did wrong , and I get angry at myself . But it hurts that he still spoke with a women for 3 weeks. The same day I found out he told me. So far it’s great, I don’t want to leave him , and it’s not about settlling. I love him and I have to trust him or this marriage won’t survive . So for now I’m moving forward .April gave me solid advice and open my eyes . You have to work on everything in life, I got married at 23 yrs old I’m now 52, life is a thief . Make it work true love and respect is hard to find …

[Sylvia59]

MY GOD did you so ever help. YES to not trusting, i guess fear of loosing us. He didnt even block the cell numbers he simply called her and told her. A fun conversation turned out too long too personal. He’s a married man.AND he deals with his own anxiety. Looking for a different conversation with someone rather than me. He looks great for 53 and so do I . I made sure to always keep myself in shape and in mind.He makes me feel good. I HAD TO THROW OUT printed paper on cell calls and txt times and dates, they were making me sick and thinking of it all day. The calls lasted 3 weeks and i was so disappointed in him. AND myself where did i go wrong .. This all happen 4 days before christmas, it was hard for me, and i wanted our marriage over. He never left our home we worked it out it took 8 days. The hardest 8 days of my life, i kept pushing him out. AS for today , i was looking for someone’s advice, not parents or a friend. I wanted to work this out myself, and your answers help me so much i can breath now. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. My grandmother told me once ”there is no remedy for love but to love more.

[Sylvia59]

Well sad to say he mention to me the same day I viewed the number on my cell bill . she took his number from a friend they txt ,called early hrs in am till I came home from work. Then it moved to hrs at night , my husband said it was a friendly talk nothing else then she wouldnt stop . So I found out and told him I was leaving him. He said it was nothing , he was devasted and called her no more calls . I can’t sleep I don’t believe him . I’m trying to move on its not easy . Asked him what was txt and talked about he said all gossip . At 5am ? And all day at work , they work in the same building . I don’t know I’m just dying inside.
But she did stop calling and texting . And my husband. I still discuss it ask questions he reponds I never needed to worry this was all useless and he,s so sorry and angry at himself . Should I move on ? Thanks for responding

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