[libra1963]

Hi April

Just an update and in need of some advice. I have for my sins returned to teaching. I was trying so hard to come out of it for a while.

I am feeling rather upset and confused. I have just found out that my ex-boss has withdrawn from the mentoring training which means he will not be mentoring me in January. I am very confused and upset as I was going to use this as an opportunity to try to get to know him better.

My initial feeling is that he is unaware that I have returned to a teaching job so probably feels that he will not mentor me and will end up with someone he does not know. I have previously told a current student that I had a job in industry so maybe word has got back to him. Or maybe he just does not want to link with me again.

How am I ever going to get the answers I so desperately crave. I still think a lot about him. I have not had any further dreams. My last one was that he came to my current work place and was very aggitated and his PA was really upset as he was not his usual self. When she left he kept saying to me that he wants to me with me and cuddled me. I was very confused in the dream and after as I am still in a sort of a relationship!

I was planning on trying to bump into him one day next week. That’s assuming he does not dart pass me like he did at the train station.

Any words of adviced welcomed. I have been trying to work out wants going on in his head and what my dreams are trying to say to me. Last week I dropped off an xmas card for him, hopefully he received it although i can not help wondering if people at my work place have picked up on the chemistry and trying to sabotage it.

I look forward to your comments.

[libra1963]

Hi April

Something very strange happened to me on Thursday. I was out visiting a friend who lives near where I work. That evening I was getting on to a bus and saw someone in a tracksuit running towards the bus. They missed it. It was my ex boss!

When we got to the tube station I did not intentially hang around to see him, I just kept walking. I knew he was on the bus directly behind me that had just pulled in. I stalled a bit in order to allow him to catch up with me but I did not turn around so it was not obvious I had seen him. Next thing I knew we were both at the ticket office and he rushed pass me, ran up the stairs at speed and ran to the furthest carriage away from me. The station was not very crowded, it was literally me and him on the platform. I went into his carriage and did not look at him and kept my head in a newspaper and then got off before him. It was so obvious as the train was not about to depart and it was not as if there would not be another train for a while. There are trains every few minutes, so I di not understand why he ran liike that and I do think it was due to me!!

I actually felt quite offended by his behaviour. He could have acknowledged me and said something. I feel he was shocked to see me. I had my hair straighten out below shoulder length and dressed nicely. He had just worked out in the gym and not wearing his usual smart suit (he is always immaculately dressed).

What do you think? when I see him again, I plan to let him know that I did see him and that he hurt me.

By the way, I have recently found out that he has signed up for the mentoring training that I suggested to him for December. He has decided to do a two day residential that I suggested and I feel flattered. I am not teaching at the moment and I was a little concerned that he would not be able to mentor me but apparently we can still work together despite that. He has not yet told me he has signed up. Wonder what the future holds.

In relaton to my ex, he is still trying to get into my bed, I dont want him using me any more. My communication with him has become clearer and clearer.

I will keep updating you.

[libra1963]

I can connect with your pain. I too am trying to come out of a very similiar relationship. You will find that it goes on for years with no change and your life will just slip away.

If you are not happy with what he is giving, tell him and then end the relationship. You cant change men. Deep down you know there is a problem and you know what that problem is. I am like you, very independent with my own money etc. Some men like independent women, some find us scary.

Another solution would be to rent out your house and find somewhere to rent that where the rent is shared by you both. That might make him feel mopre like a man and making a contribution in the relationship. At less you can end a rental agreement fairly easily if it does not work out. Where the church is concerned, this sounds very important to him. May be you sould try an join in. Some churches have a real family feel to them and this could be why he enjoys it.

Let us know wat you plan to do. John Gray has written some really good books that has made me understand men better.

Let us know how you get on.

[libra1963]

Hi April

I’m not sure how to describe him, but my child’s father has resurfaced. He disappeared all summer and then turned up on my door step this morning. He dropped us to his sons school. This evening we was inviting himself around later that night!

We have know each other 26 years. Got to gether 10 years ago. Have a child, yet I have never met his family, never been invited to his house, do not know where he is working now , never talk about a future together – just plodding along. He feels he can just disappear without tellling me and turn up expecting me to have my arms open. Sorry I am not any one’s door mat!! I texted him and told him clearly that I am not married to him! He texted back sounding surprised!

I have had enough. All summer I have been emotionally torned with my ex-boss. We have been in touch via e-mail a few times. I am off the pay roll end of this month. My last communication was to advise him that I hada new job at the airport and needed the personnel manager to do something for me. He passed on the info tot he personnel manager but has not said anything to me about my career decision. May be he’ll do something nearer the end of the month. I havent seen him since late Aug. He has signed up to do the mentoring training in December that I suggested as a way of keeping in touch but I have decided to come out of teaching for a while. I still think about him but as we are not seeing each other its getting cold.

I will update you later this month. somehting is telling me my ex-boss is going to do soemthing to get to see me. As for my ex boyfriend – he’ll always be my child’s father but I cant see him changing or making changes. Me and my 3 children are s unhappy with the domestic situation and pray for change.

Will update soon.

LOL XX

[libra1963]

It seems like you have had quite a roller coaster relationship with this girl. I can see why you were attracted to her. she has however caused a lot of rifts between you and your family. I feel you should put your family first. They did not take to her and you have now broken up with her. May be its for the best. You sould like a really nice guy but there were too many negatives in that relationship. Miss Perfect will come along soon who will make you much happier. Break ups are always painful but things will get better. 😐

[libra1963]

Hi April

My ex-boss has made contact – just as I thought he would. He remained professional but used my private e-mail so clearly has kept that close to his heart. He asked how I was and the result of a recent interview near where he lived and advised me that a reference request had been received and other bits of information. I felt really happy that he made the move as it had been over three weeks and I knew if I waited he would contact me.

I e-mailed back and thanked him. He is due to send through more info so will leave him to keep running if he’s interested. I am freeing myself up for others but no on else on the horizon. Just trying to sort out my career at the minute.

I felt happy that the wait paid off. 😎

[libra1963]

Hi April

Just an update on my situation. I have now officially left the college I was working at. I dressed up really smart, had my hair sleeked back and good make up and held my head high as I made my entrance. I had spoken to my ex boss a few days previously to ask if he still wanted me to come in. he was fine about it.

He later asked to see me in his office as he was helping me with an interview assessment that I found really hard. He again gave up his precious time to help me. 😀 Because it was a serious meeting it did not feel right to flirt too much. However I rubbed my legs and crossed them. 😎

After some significant time, Ithanked him for his time and gave him a thank you card that I had carefully written. I thanked him for his time and understanding and really went into one emotionally about how much he helped me. I also bigged him up. Stated that I would liek to keep in touch in a poem and placed a X at the end. This card gave me more flirt power.

My interview is Wednesday and it is in an area near where he lives. He has really been selling the area to me. How much more clues do I need to recognise how this guy feels about me. I do not plan to contact him now. He has my mobile, e-mail address. I have done my bit, I am going to see what he does now. He’s Capricorn. Aparrently they are very slow and you need to give them space and be patient with them.

I feel so god I have now given in the card. I read cards and all my cards are saying that I a going to be very happy and that we will get married. 😉

Any comments welcomed.

[libra1963]

Hi April

Thanks for your reply. I was not sure what you meant by the following:

[color=#FF0000]“You may also want to consider the fact that he knows about your relationship with someone else, and that’s keeping him from making a move on you. It may be time to clean house and start out fresh, if you know what I mean”.[/color]I am coming out of a relationship. Its been dead for some years now. I have not had a chance to speak to my crush about this as work as it did not seem the right place. When he asked about whether I was Ms or Mrs, I was tempted to blurt out but thought, no, keep something back.

When I go into work next week for my farewell, I am going to give him a card expressing my thanks for all that he has done. (If it was not for him and his support and affection – I would not have got through the horrendous ordeal at work. Thanks to him I was able to keep my head up high). I plan to call him prior to the day and ask about further details. At this stage I will see if I can build the courgage to ask him to meet outside of college for a coffee or something. I wanted to use that opportunity to flirt. I would have re-read your book by that time.

Any further words welcomed.

[libra1963]

Hi April

I did it. I waited for ages for him at the train station. Finally got on the same train but could not bring myself to speak to him as I felt it would look obvious.

i found the opportunity to sit near him but did not look at him as he was deeply in him book and I pretended to be although I could not see anything without my glasses!!! I saw a reflection of him in a window and it looked like he was smiling. I think he saw me. I hope he continues to think about me. I chicken out as I did not want him to think I am some lunatic stalker. I got off a few stops before him to look less obvious.

i will be seeing him in two weeks time for my final farewell at the college where I will be presented with flowers. I hope to get to speak to him on this day and ask to spend some time out of college to talk about career progress and “other” matters”.

Sorry I was not brave enough to make this venture more exciting for your readers.

LOL XXX

[libra1963]

Hi April

I have been re-reading your comments and referring back to your book. I do not want to look like I am stalking this guy but I really do not want to waste any more time on him.

I plan to do one more thing now that we are not working together as he has no indication that I am interested in him. I want to let him know suterly and then back off and see how he reacts.

I was planning on intentionally bumping into him as he leaves work and travelling with him on the train. I thought this would allow us some time away from work to talk although public. I thought I could use it as a chance to flirt and then see how he reacts. I will only do this once so as not to freak him out.

What do you think?

[libra1963]

Hi April

I have no completed your book. There were some really interesting things in there. Most of which I am doing. What I am still at loose ends about is the fact that I am afraid I am going to lose him when I break away from the college. I only have one more visit to the college and then that is it. I feel strongly that I am going to get this air cabin crew job so the mentoring may not be an opportunity to meet with him as I will no longer be teaching.

Help! What shall I do? I really like this guy. I could send him a card with a few appreciative words in but he still does not know how much I like him?

Your advice will be welcomed.

LOL 😕

[libra1963]

It sounds like you both need to talk. Does he know you are not happy with his demands? If you resist him he proberly will turn to someone else and your marriage will be on the rocks.

Can you not ask him to prepare dinner a few times a week while you run a hot bath and relax. You will then feel a little more turned on and be more accommodating and then his desires will drift off. Do, however, make a bit more of an effor on weekends as sex is very important in relationships.

If all fails you may need to see a counsellor.

Good luck! 🙂

[libra1963]

Hi April

I have just the first few pages of your book so have loads more questions.

I have now ledt my job and have a strong chance of getting the Cabin Crew job for a major airline. Do you think he will still find me attractive as an “air stewardness” seeing that I was a manager in education before – big drop in salary?

I have three children for two previous relationships – the older two do not live with me – do you think he will be put off my that seeing that he has his own children?

I have heard that his girlfriend is very young , 11 years younger than him. Will he stay with her rather than develop a relationship with me – I recall what you said about Charles and Camilla but they had history – so its different! I am 46 but look 35. I do look after myself although could lose a few pounds!

I want him to ask me out so that we can talk but I dont think he will as he is not clear as to how I feel about him and I do not know what to do without embarassing myself. When I see him it is normally at my old work place. I have thought of trying to bump into him on the street – I tried it once but I was sitting in my car and it did not quite work. He kinda wanted to talk t o me and looked surprised to see me. I did not want to appear like a stolker?

Any further advice welcomed. I have been looking into the meaning of the dream with the ring and I think it means that he was giving me his love. Not sure what the party dream was saying to me.

[libra1963]

I don’t dream very often but I have had two dreams that have really stood out in my mind and I was wondering whether you or the readers could help me to understand them.

You may remember my previous post about my crush on my ex boss. Well the dreams have been based around him.

Number 1

Not long ago we both had to sign an agreement. Just before this I dreamt that he gave me a ring. It was not a very special ring. We were not in an exclusive relationship. The ring did not look very grand. I recall in real life looking at his ring which is not very grand either. I do not understand what this dream means. Clearly it does not mean engagement.

Number 2

I dream that I was invited to some sort of house warming party at his house. His girlfriend was there but was so unfriendly and neither he or she were in the house together. They were out of the house most of the time. The whole party just felt strange and I felt uncomfortable as I in the dream had feelings for him. The house was in need of work and decoration (bit like mine in real life).

Can anyone help me interprete these dreams. My unsubconscieous mind is trying to tell me something. I have not had a dream since these two.

Thanks

[libra1963]

Hi April

I have bought your book and started printing it as I can not read for long on line and it stopped at page 12 and I can not get back into the order to print any further pages. Can you please advise.

thanks

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