[desperateforanswers]

As far as breadwinner? Depends on how you want to define it. Yes he makes more money than I do obviously, does he make enough to support our family comfortably? No. He has passed up jobs to make more money and provide the benefits we need because he “likes his job”. (by benefits I mean health insurance). I have offered to go back to work and let him stay home with the kids (during the day it is just our youngest the older two are in school) but he doesn’t want to do that. Yes he is a good father when he wants to be. He is mostly the playmate when he isn’t too busy watching sports or playing on his play station.

This is point blank what he does for our family. He goes to work, comes home makes a plate of food, brings it down to his spot, showers then returns to his spot and sits there all night. This is the typical routine for him.

I know I need a break and have reached my breaking point where I just have the attitude of “I don’t care” towards him. There was a point where I cared and told him every day I loved him and sent him quirky texts throughout the day to make him feel wanted and let him know I appreciate him.

There is no sex in our marriage. I will be the first to admit that. I will also admit I know I am not a “perfect wife”. I am not trying to say that I am at all, but I am willing to try and make changes to be better I just don’t know how/what to change.

I guess I have a hard time making him feel like a “hero” because he isn’t my hero lately or making him feel wanted because I simply just don’t want him. I try to want him, but I just can’t bring myself to, I am resenting him to much to let other feelings in again. I guess I have it in my head that I already feel like a single parent so I might as well be one. Which I know is a ridiculous thing to think but that’s why I came here for advice. I don’t know what/how to change to make it work.

[Member]

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