[royboy11]

I definetely hear what you’re saying. And it just hurts so much because I understand every bit of it, but I can’t bring myself to actually leave, or be able to walk away when he wants to leave…

I’ve got a new chapter of this story for you.

So, I went to see him and talk to him 2 days after the “break up”.
He had his mind made up, he said he wanted to be around tons of people, he didn’t want to worry about me getting mad for him hanging out with his bad friends..
He wanted to be a teenager, and be rebellious.
I am much more mature and I know exactly what I want.
So we were talking and his mom came in and talked to us and asked us why he wanted to break up.
He said because he wants to be able to do whatever he wants.
She said in order for us to work, we have to both work together.
He can’t lie to me anymore, break promises, ignore me.
And i need to stop getting so mad at him, but i need to learn to trust him as well, which will obviously take time.

So then we went to dinner with his parents and all was well.
I was still obviously hurt over the situation. But I was content finally.

Then, I went over there this Sunday to hangout like normal.
We were fine, I checked his phone to see something, and I saw a bunch of deleted text messages between him and another girl in my class.
There were a lot.
Also, I went onto his snapchat, and he had added 15 girls to his friends list.
And the same girl that he had been texting was his “best friend” on there which means he snapchatted her the most.
It said they had sent snapchat back and forth for 3 days.
He never did this or talked to any of these girls.
He claims they are now his friends.
And he would always get mad at me if I texted another guy, or snap chatted another guy.
He denies it now. Saying he can do what he wants and he doesn’t care about how it makes me feel.

So then, after I confront him over text about all the girls, he starts acting very strange.
He is suddenly very cold and blunt.
He is answering everything with “idk”
And worst of all, he won’t say I love you back at all. Not once.
He would ignore me on the phone, and not care at all.
The next day (today) he ignored me for most of the day until tonight.
He did what he did last week, saying it was over and that he couldn’t do it anymore and that I needed to consider myself single now.
He wa saying he wanted to do whatever he wanted again.
He said that everybody makes mistakes and that if leaving me is a mistake, oh well.
He kept saying that it was over.

Then suddenly, he sent me this…

“I don’t know what I want it’s seriously hurting my head to figure out what I want right now I love you and I want to be with you but I feel like I can’t take it anymore. I just need to sleep and I’m praying that God give me a sign of what is best I love you I’ll text you in the morning with my final decision. I’m sorry. I love you. Goodnight.”

And then after, this…

“I was just thinking and what changed my mind was I know that you will always love me for me. And even though some people call you “crazy” you arent.. you’re just crazy in love I can’t see anyone else ever loving me like you do and love like that is something I never want to lose. Something that I never want to let go of. My life is Going to change. Yes I’m still going to have friends. Like isaiah but you have to know that I’m not stupid like that okay? All I want rachel is a little space. And for you not to go so angry and upset at little things. Or medium sized things like potholes… (trying to make you laugh) I love you and I’m sorry that the few days have been so hard on you and I’m sorry I’m such an asshole. Please come over soon. I need you. I need you here beside me. I love you rachel and I’m sorry that I had to do this to you. I’m glad I came to realize what was best for me and my future. I love you, goodnight beautiful.”

Thus whole time I’ve been talking to my mom and crying all night about this situation.. I honestly thought it was over and then he did that… it’s an emotional Rollercoaster…
And every time I just let someone down with the decision I make.

It’s stressing my mom put to see me so hurt and in pain and crying over him…

I can’t take it, I just want everyone to be happy, and I want to be happy with him.

But it’s like whatever I do, it’s the wrong choice.

[Member]

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