[reggie1981]

Thank you for your reply,
We have known each other for almost 4 years. When we first dated it lasted a few months, it ended due to his ex wife taking his girls to live in Australia without his knowledge. His priority was his kids and because of that he said he wasn’t sure if he would move also and he needed time to work that out and it would be unfair to carry on with the relationship until he figured out what he wanted to do.
We stayed in contact as friends for over a year when he said he was finally moving. Just before he left we went on a few dates, one thing lead to another and we both admitted that we loved each other but again timing wasn’t right. He moved, continuing to stay in contact because not only we’re we good friends we loved each other. His first few months there, we talked about us and what if i moved there? The big problem was my children, how would they cope and would their father say yes to the move. My children have a great relationship with their dad and i didn’t want to take them away. So I had to weigh things up. I did eventually ask my ex husband if i could take the kids to Australia and naturally he said no. I understood where he was coming from and the kids we’re little, among everything else. But i flew over to see him for 2 weeks to really see if what we had was real and maybe we could do the long distance thing or try and work out what our next step would be. I went over spent 2 amazing weeks with him, But the timing just wasn’t right. He felt bad about being the reason my children would be moving away from their dad and although we loved each other it just wasn’t the time. so i flew home heart broken. We both moved on, fast forward 2 years of staying in contact and writing and calling, and getting to really know each other as good friends and he tells me he’s coming home for a visit. Around this time me ex husband broke up with his girlfriend, and he had talked about moving to Australia, I had lived there before having children and wanted to go to go back eventually. When my current partner arrived we went away for a weekend and we spent most of his holiday together. I told him that i might be moving to Australia and he said if i did he would like to try again. He flew back to Perth, I asked my ex about moving and he said yes, This is a massive decision he made because i know how close he is with the kids. So after selling everything and 6 months of organising and talking, I moved. and now here I am.

We did have a talk last night about it and i think we were both had different expectations of what was going to happen. He said he just wanted to let me know what he was feeling. There was no arguments leading up to it either. I appreciate that he’s wants to communicate about how he feels and i don’t want that to stop. But i did tell him that i can’t continue to emotionally invest in this relationship if theres an expiry date on it. Its like he’s put a disclaimer in there without me knowing…
Knowing that this is all knew for everyone i understand that he’s feeling unsure but surely he would have thought about this before the move? before i sold everything i had? before i moved the kids over? before he became part of my children’s lives? My life?

I do have a back up plan, I just had never thought that it would be needed.

Only time will tell I guess.

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