[angeleyes08]

So do I just move on without any explanation? I eel like i need to give him a reason WHY I would want to move on. Is it okay for me to sit down and tell him the reason why I think it’s not working out? I want him to understand what went wrong for me on my end…..

[angeleyes08]

April,

I would like to give you an update and ask you for more advice. I found out that the hypno therapy was for his personal issues such as hair loss and self esteem as well as problems with his Dad. Shortly later I asked you about the book, we had an argument over something that seemed very serious at the time and I had reasons to question his loyalty. I went through his car and his bags. I also used that as an opportunity to tell him that I saw the book. He said that the book is from a few years ago that he already read and it was in his house and he wanted to keep it out o the house so I would not ind it and question him.

This brought up another issue. He seemed to be frustrated for days after we had this huge blow out and I decided to believe him and move on. One night at dinner the truth finally came out. He said he was super missed that I went through his stuff. He said it;s not cool to look thorugh peoples stuff. This actually answered my question that I was going to ask him in a few weeks. I was going to bring up the subject of us moving in. Now he is 45 and I am 30. It has almost been 3 years ( 1st year was on and off). I typically would not rush things BUT due to our age difference I feel like I am at this point where I need to knwo what he think about our future. I want to ask him if he is ready for us to at least live together because I dont want to waste time at my age. The fact that he got freaked out that I checked his car and his bathroom, tells me that he is NOT ready to share his space with me. He is not ready to give up privacy. After he told me he was pissed that I “snooped” I broke down and told him that we have two different views. I lived with a guy for 6 years before him and we shared everyitng. He is 45 and never lived with anyone so I think he is not used to that. He is used to eveyritng being only his and for him. After the fight, he said sorry and he said I have valid points.

Is it time for me to ask him? I dont knwo i I give him an “ultimatum” or if I simply tell him that i he is not ready to take the next steps after almost 3 years an at his age, then I need to move on. Now sure how to talk to him about it. I don;t want to pressure him. I want it to be natural BUT I know in our relationship I will ALWAYS have ot be the “pusher”

[angeleyes08]

It has been 2.5 years. First year was on and off because I just got out of a 6 year relationship and wanted to party a little, so he wouldn’t take me seriously. We broke up a couple of time but it has been a full year without any breakups and a lot o improvement and love. he is 45 and I am 30. He kind of has commitment issues since he has never been married and I am his second longest relationship.

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