[Serena Vale]

Shelly, I’m going to be real with you, this guy likes you, but he’s not giving you the clarity or consistency you deserve.

Seeing you once a week isn’t the problem. Busy men exist.
But not telling you he has kids? Only using his work number? No real effort to stay connected when you’re apart? Those are signs he’s keeping you in a limited space in his life.

And I know you’re scared to ask because you really like him, but that’s exactly why you should ask. You can’t build something real on confusion.

Just keep it simple:
“Hey, I really enjoy what we have, but I don’t know where I stand. What are you looking for?”

His answer will tell you everything.

You don’t need to beg, chase, or guess. If he wants something serious, he’ll be clear. If he doesn’t… at least you’ll stop breaking your own heart in the quiet moments.

Choose clarity, even if it’s uncomfortable. It hurts less than staying in limbo.

[Serena Vale]

Honestly? If you like her, you need to make a small move before she’s gone. It doesn’t have to be dramatic. Just catch her for a quick second, even if it’s while you’re restocking something, and say something like, “Hey, we don’t get much time to talk here, but I’d like to stay in touch. Can I get your number?”

That’s it. Simple. Clean.

You don’t need the perfect moment. You just need a moment. She’s leaving soon, so don’t overthink it. If she’s been warm and you both get along, she’ll probably be happy you asked.

Worst case? She says no and life goes on. Best case? You don’t lose the chance to know someone you actually like.

Just be brave for 10 seconds. That’s all it takes.

[Serena Vale]

For the older guy from church, yes, he likes you. You don’t talk that openly about your life with someone you don’t care about. And the way he made sure you had a ride while he’s away? That’s effort. But he’s also older, laid off, and probably doesn’t feel stable enough to make a move yet. Men pull back when they don’t feel secure. Give him space. If he wants something real, he’ll show you.

For the guy you met online, he doesn’t seem serious. If he liked you, he’d ask for your number and actually plan something. Three weeks with no move? That’s your answer. Don’t chase someone who can’t even stay online long enough to reply.

Honestly, listen to your own peace, the first guy feels steady and kind, the second one feels confusing and hot-cold. Only invest where the energy feels consistent.

You deserve someone who shows up. Not someone who leaves you guessing.

[Serena Vale]

It sounds like she liked you, but she isn’t ready for anything serious, especially now that she’s back at school with a whole different life happening around her. That’s why she’s hot one minute and distant the next. It’s not about you doing something wrong… she’s just not all-in.

And I get it, you miss the connection. But try not to chase her energy. If she’s not texting first anymore, that’s her way of pulling back. You’re allowed to pull back too.

Focus on your life, your friends, school… that’s how you stop feeling so heavy about her. The right girl won’t make you guess where you stand. She’ll show up.

And talking to new people doesn’t have to be complicated, a smile, a small comment about whatever is happening around you. Keep it natural. You don’t need perfect lines, just confidence and a little kindness.

You’ll be okay. And you’ll meet someone who makes things feel easy.

[Serena Vale]

Honestly, love… you’re not being selfish at all. Half your monthly salary is a lot, and no gift should leave you stressed or struggling. Wanting to give him something meaningful is sweet, but it shouldn’t come at the cost of your own stability.

Asking friends or bandmates to pitch in is a great idea, it keeps things fair and still gives him something he’ll love. And if it takes a little longer and you give it on your anniversary instead, that’s totally fine.

And remember this: a good partner won’t expect you to break your budget for a gift. Your care means more than the price tag. Take care of yourself first.

[Serena Vale]

Honestly, sweetheart… this isn’t love, it’s control. You’re 17, and he’s 23 , that age gap alone puts you in a vulnerable spot, and he’s using that. The guilt, the jealousy, the “don’t leave me,” the checking who you talk to… that’s not healthy, and it’s not something you can fix by loving him harder.

You’re supposed to be finishing school, hanging out with your friends, figuring out your life, not carrying the weight of someone who’s afraid you’ll “find someone else.” That’s his insecurity, not your responsibility.

You already felt the difference when you were at your mom’s, you could breathe. That says everything.

If you’re confused, trust the version of you that wants freedom, friends, and your diploma. That’s the real you talking. Go back home, finish school, and build your future. The right love will never make you feel small.

You won’t regret choosing yourself.

[Serena Vale]

Girl… a ring doesn’t erase what you just saw with your own eyes. If he was at her house, sleeping there, and she had his phone, something is off. Even if they didn’t sleep together, the situation is messy, and he created that mess.

Before you think about marriage, you need the truth:
• Is he actually divorced?
• Why was he really there?
• And what does he plan to do to fix this?

Right now, don’t focus on the engagement, focus on clarity. If he can’t be honest and set boundaries with his child’s mom, this won’t work long-term.

And no, you don’t need to feel guilty for defending yourself. But the situation shouldn’t have gotten that far in the first place.

Just slow down. Get the facts. Don’t marry a man you have to chase for honesty.

[Serena Vale]

Honestly, the most special thing you can do is make sure you both feel safe and relaxed. So first, use protection every single time. Nothing kills the moment like a pregnancy scare.

As for making it special, it doesn’t have to be fancy. Just slow down, talk to each other, laugh a little, and let it be natural. You’re both still learning, that’s okay.

Keep it protected, keep it honest, keep it fun. The moment will make itself special.

[Serena Vale]

It sounds like your jealousy isn’t about him, it’s about your fear of losing him. And since he hasn’t given you any reason to doubt him, the worry is coming from inside you, not his actions.

When you feel jealous, pause and ask yourself if anything real is happening or if it’s just fear. Don’t react right away.

You don’t need to tell him all this, just work on calming the thoughts and trusting what he’s already shown you. With time, the trust will grow.

[Serena Vale]

Okay, let me be real with you, this whole relationship is running on insecurity, fear, and guessing. You cheated on him, you’re scared he’ll do the same, you had a dream, and suddenly everything feels like a sign.

But here’s the part you need to hear:
If you don’t feel secure with him, and he doesn’t make you feel safe or chosen, then it’s not a healthy relationship. And calling the other girl “ugly” doesn’t change the real issue, there’s energy between them that’s making you uncomfortable.

Dream or no dream, your gut is telling you something.

You both have broken trust. You both have hurt each other. And now you’re stuck in a loop of suspicion and jealousy.

A relationship shouldn’t feel like this.
You deserve someone who makes you feel wanted.
Someone you don’t have to spy on.
Someone you don’t have to compare yourself to other girls for.

If you’re this stressed and this unsure, maybe it’s time to step back and choose peace instead of drama. Let yourself breathe. Let yourself heal.

You’re not crazy, you’re just tired of fighting for something that isn’t giving you peace.

[Serena Vale]

You’re not crazy, you’re just torn. You love him, but you also feel tied to your family’s expectations. That’s a painful place to be in, and it makes every decision feel heavier.

Here’s the truth in the simplest way:
You can’t build a relationship with someone and keep hiding behind your family at the same time. He felt like he was second place, and honestly… he was. That hurt him, and that’s why he pulled away and reacted the way he did.

And now that he called again, it woke up everything you were trying to bury.

But before you think about him, you need to think about you, what kind of life do you actually want? Are you willing to stand up to your family for love? Or are you choosing the path they want for you?

Neither answer is wrong. But you have to be honest with yourself, because if you don’t make that decision, every relationship will feel like this, fear, guilt, pressure.

Right now, don’t run back to him. Don’t jump into a marriage you don’t want either.
Slow down. Get clear. Talk to your family honestly. Tell them how all of this has made you feel.

You can’t change the past, but you can choose what you do next. And that choice needs to come from you, not fear.

[Serena Vale]

I can feel how much you care about them, that’s clear. And honestly, your feelings make sense. Anyone would feel uneasy about their partner flying to see the ex’s family, especially when the ex is right there.

But here’s the hard part: you don’t really get to control this right now. You’re her boyfriend, not her husband, and she still has her own history, her own connections, and her own choices. The child also has bonds you didn’t build, and those are complicated too.

What you can do is talk to her gently and honestly:
“I’m not trying to stop you, I just want you to understand why this makes me uncomfortable.”

And about being called “Dad, that’s a big title to take on when the relationship isn’t long-term or official yet. It might be kinder to step back and let her call you something else until things are more solid.

You’re not crazy. You just care. But you also need to stay grounded in what your role actually is right now.

[Serena Vale]

Honestly, I don’t think you’re being weird at all. Sharing a bathroom and living with a random girl from Craigslist when he has a serious girlfriend would make anyone uncomfortable. It’s the fact that he didn’t even check with you that stings.

Just talk to him calmly.
Something like: “Hey, this makes me uncomfortable. I’m not saying no, I just want to understand why this is the only option.”

You’re not being controlling, you’re just setting a normal boundary. If he cares, he’ll take your feelings seriously and look for another option. If he brushes you off, that tells you something too.

Keep it honest but gentle. You’re allowed to speak up.

[Serena Vale]

I get why you’re scared, when someone makes you feel this seen and this wanted, it’s easy to fall fast. And honestly, he hasn’t really done anything wrong. He showed up for you, twice. He talks about plans. He makes you feel safe. That matters.

But feelings aren’t the same as knowing someone. You’ve only spent a short time together in real life, and right now everything is new, intense, and romantic. That’s why it feels so big.

You don’t need to fully trust him yet. You also don’t need to pull away. Just stay open and pay attention to his actions. If he says he wants to move, let him prove it. If he says he misses you, see if he shows up consistently.

You’re allowed to enjoy what’s happening and protect your heart at the same time. Let things grow slowly. Don’t put your whole life on pause for him. If he’s real, he’ll meet you halfway, not just with words, but with steady effort.

[Serena Vale]

Honestly, this isn’t as scary as it feels. A lot of people have small preferences or kinks, and a foot fetish is one of the more common, harmless ones. It doesn’t make him weak or “less of a man.” It just means he trusts you enough to be honest.

What really matters is you. If it makes you uncomfortable, you can say that. If you’re open to trying later, that’s okay too. You don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for.

You’re not overreacting, it’s normal to feel a little weird when someone shares something new. Just take it slow, talk openly, and remember: a fetish doesn’t define a whole relationship.

[Member]

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