[Lucas]

If you want her to see you in a romantic way, you need to step out of the “friend zone.” You have to take a risk, even if it might affect or even ruin your friendship.
Tell her that you like her and that you see her as more than just a friend. Try to impress her and show her that you’re interested—not just through words, but through your actions as well.
Even though you’re already best friends, there is already some chemistry there. You just need to develop it further, like what naturally happened to you.

[Lucas]

You’re not wrong, and you didn’t do anything bad. But maybe the reason he said that is because he was very attached to you at first, and sometimes feelings really do change.

When he said he’s better off alone, that might also be true because sometimes people genuinely feel that way. Maybe that’s where he found his peace of mind.

I’m not saying you are a toxic person—maybe he just realized something during the time he had space to be on his own.

[Lucas]

I understand why you’re worried, especially since your fiancé has a history with his past job and this is a new job for both of you.
My advice, if you want an honest answer, is to talk to him. Ask him why he left work when he only has a 1-hour break, especially since it already takes 20 minutes of travel time, and why there was a lie about his mother when it turns out it was just lunch.
You should confront this before you get married. It doesn’t look like there will be a good future if situations like this keep happening at work.

[Lucas]

Why would he do that? Is John gay—does he have feelings for your boyfriend? Just kidding.
But maybe your boyfriend is right—you might be overreacting to what’s happening. You already talked to him, and it seems like your boyfriend is okay and even said that he also wants you around.
Don’t focus too much on John. At the end of the day, it’s your relationship with your boyfriend. No matter how much John interferes, if your boyfriend wants to be with you, John can’t really take that away.
Just also give your boyfriend time with others too.

[Lucas]

Why is she shy around you if she’s your girlfriend, and what reason does she have to feel scared when you look at her? You should first try to find out why, so we can help you better and so you can also understand how to help yourself.

[Lucas]

I don’t know what your question is, but if you’re not comfortable with your boyfriend calling his ex, talk to him so he won’t do it again.

[Lucas]

You’re overthinking things too much. Nothing is final yet—if it’s still 5–6 years away, a lot can still happen.
Also, you’re already grown. After you finish your studies, you’ll look for a job and become independent, so you’ll be able to make decisions for yourself. Instead of stressing yourself over these things, it’s better to just focus on your studies for now—that’s the most effective thing you can do.

[Lucas]

You’re overthinking things too much. Nothing is final yet—if it’s still 5–6 years away, a lot can still happen.
Also, you’re already grown. After you finish your studies, you’ll look for a job and become independent, so you’ll be able to make decisions for yourself. Instead of stressing yourself over these things, it’s better to just focus on your studies for now—that’s the most effective thing you can do.

[Lucas]

I don’t know what experiences are holding you back from entering a relationship, but you need to remove that fear within yourself that the same bad things will happen again. Instead of being afraid, you should learn from those experiences.
Maybe you just haven’t found the right person for you yet. You need to trust again, because not everyone you meet will hurt you or do something bad to you or anything you don’t want to happen. There are still people out there who will make you feel special.

[Lucas]

I think it’s normal that he sometimes doesn’t message you or suddenly messages again, since he doesn’t have any commitment to you—and that seems to be the kind of situation you’ve allowed.
It looks like he doesn’t really have feelings for you, but you clearly have feelings for him. You’re too affected when he doesn’t message you, and it seems like you’re rushing things.
If he truly liked you, he would be the one initiating. It’s better not to chase him—that’s not a good idea.

[Member]

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