[James]

That’s right—you should stay cool and not chase him. Don’t show that you are always available for him. Also, don’t expect too much from him right away. If he really likes you, he will make an effort to talk to you and make things happen.

It’s better to show early on that he is not something you can easily lose, and that you can move on. Maybe he will even start chasing you if you do that. But if he completely disappears, that’s also okay—just move on. That should already be your mindset from the beginning instead of stressing yourself out.

[James]

Wow, Larry is really such a womanizer. He has a wife who is sick, and on top of that he also has a connection with this widow where it seems like he’s deepening things into a romantic relationship. And then what about you—what are you in all of this? You’re also his partner, but it feels like there’s no full commitment or transparency.

Don’t call him to monitor him. You need to talk about boundaries and clarify where you both really stand and what you actually are to each other. You need that so you can protect yourself physically and emotionally.

If he can’t be committed to you, then just leave him. Let’s see if anyone will still take care of him in that situation. With everything going on in his life, he still can’t even treat you well or be a good partner to you.

[James]

So maybe the reason he cheated was because he lost sexual desire for you. If you want to fix your relationship, you should take care of yourself—focus on your appearance, stay fit, eat healthy, and try to make your sex life more exciting. You could also research different ways to improve intimacy to get ideas. Maybe that could help bring back your husband’s sexual interest in you, if you really want to work on the relationship.

But for me, it might be better if you just separate, because he already cheated on you and had sex with someone else. And in my opinion, no matter what the reason is, cheating is never justified.

[James]

Yes, don’t settle for less. Of course, choose the person you truly want. If the right one hasn’t come yet, don’t pressure yourself.

If you have certain standards for women, it really isn’t easy to find someone, especially now that you’re also older. That’s just how it is.

[Member]

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