Got it.
It sounds like you ran into financial problems and couldn’t afford to pay rent, so you moved in with a guy you knew for a few months and have been trading sex for rent at his place. When I asked you if this was a romantic problem, you didn’t say yes. You said you were having a “physical” relationship with him — which helps us define the relationship — which is important. You described him as “caring, generous, kind and thoughtful”, but you didn’t say he was the man of your dreams, sexy, romantic, your better half — or any of the ways people describe a lover. This is a business deal, and I think it’s important for you to be honest with yourself about the relationship you’re having with him and that this isn’t a romance.
It sounds like you don’t like the living conditions in his house because he’s not tidy, doesn’t fix things and his dogs are undesirable. It also sounds like you’ve since gotten a job so you’re considering moving somewhere else where you can pay rent with dollars and shorten a uncomfortably long commute to work.
The problem comes in when you describe him as “the best guy I’ve ever been with”. I think this is where you’re confusing yourself. This isn’t a guy who dated you. He’s a guy who’s trading sex for rent. This isn’t a guy who cares about making you comfortable in his home — he’s content to leave things unfixed and dirty. So, no — you’re not being shallow and materialistic — but I do think you’re not being honest with yourself about what’s going on. This isn’t a romance. It’s business. If you want romance with him, then move out, live on your own, and see if he’s willing to date you. But just be honest with yourself, so you don’t get confused.
I hope that helps.
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