"April Masini answers questions no one else can and tells you the truth that no one else will."
"April Masini answers questions no one else can
and tells you the truth that no one else will."

Am I wasting my time with this guy? So confused!

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  • #7732
    ikatys
    Member #373,938

    Well I’m 22, I met this lovely guy last year summer around July and we clicked on straight away it was an instant spark! However I went back to university in September and what not and obviously I only saw him whenever I got the chance , we have had sex twice now (because I’m scared to catch loads of feelings) however I know I’ve caught plenty of feelings for this guy, he’s said he’s liked me but he’s only said it once Iv brought it up, like when we’re together we treat eachother like we’re a couple but we’re not! I know it’s not all about a title but i really do wanna be his girlfriend and he knows this cause I brought it up , he said that he says we shouldn’t rush it that I just got back from university again and we’ve started seeing eachother again however it’s been almost a year next month since we met and I have caught feelings. The last times I’ve seen him we’ve had one date and I’ve been to his house … He said his mum knows about me, and I’ve met his dad , he said he would wanna have something with me but I feel like time is dragging and I’m catching more feelings! I don’t wanna bring this up with him anymore cause Iv said it twice and I don’t wanna push him away, Iv been back almost 3 weeks now and I feel like we haven’t had s proper date in ages, he does call me he prefers to do that than text me. I feel like I get mixed signals from him, don’t know what to do. I’m scared to keep sleeping with him cause I know il fall more .. he says he’s interested in me, I do see that sometimes but I wish he showed more attention it really sucks! What do I doo!!!

    #34442
    AskApril Masini
    Keymaster

    You’re going to have to deal with the fact that you’re in a rush — and he isn’t. Although it’s been a year since you met him, you were at college for 9 of those almost 12 months. You’ve only had one date. I think you should start “your clock” running now — not from the time you met him a year ago. Use the first three months — from May to July — to decide if the two of you want to continue dating. If you both do, then use the next three months from July to September or October, to decide if you want to be monogamous. I know this feels super slow, but it’s a smart way to not rush into things and avoid getting hurt because of the rush. I don’t think you’re wasting your time but I do think you should be a little more realistic about his clock and it’s differences from yours.

    I hope that helps. 😉

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