I understand why you’re upset about your boyfriend offering to help his ex-girlfriend/baby mama move into a home three hours away. Believe me — I get it. But… it sounds like the two of them have an amicable relationship and they don’t fight about their daughter or about you. That’s huge. It also sounds like they don’t fight about money or custody, and that’s even huger. I completely understand that you feel like she’s taking advantage of him financially, but that’s really between the two of them. I don’t mean to belittle your feelings at all, but these aren’t problems you should want to go to the mat for. They’re annoying, but they’re part of the landscape that occurs when you date a single parent.
Some ways to make your life better may be offering to come with your boyfriend to help his baby mama/ex move. You won’t feel like you’re left out, and she’ll see how important you and your boyfriend are, and she won’t be able to fantasize him without you if you’re right there. Yes, it’s a total drag to help someone move, but maybe being there will make you feel insecure and more confident about your relationship. As for gas money, etc and her taking advantage of your boyfriend, don’t sweat the small stuff. If the two of you decide to marry, you’ll have some legal concerns and you can address those then, but for now, breathe, have a glass of wine, and go to a yoga class, knowing these are not the stuff of drama as much as they are the complicated relationship dynamics of blended families. 😉
