[Anonymous]

My boyfriend ,who is 38 years old by the way, is throwing fits like a child. Last night there wasn’t any toilet paper in the spare bathroom,(that he never uses), he wakes me up at three am, furious and screaming. I thought he was drunk, it was almost comical. I almost laughed but he was dead serious. He was so mad. This is the third time in the past few weeks he has been screaming and yelling at me over stupid stuff. He was mad earlier that he didn’t have any clean under shirts and then again a few days ago cause I hit a couple of pot holes while driving him home in his car. Its crazy, I don’t even know how to respond. He says that me not taking care of stuff is stressing him out.I am living with him and I am taking 18 hrs of classes so the housework does fall behind. – So how do you respond? the shirt thing I ignored him and got in the shower, the pothole thing we got into a horrible fight and he threatened to break up with me and then last night i was so dead tired I just put paper in the bathroom and went back to sleep.My initial reaction is to leave but then I will be homeless and I don’t have a job.Its crazy to break up over toilet paper but he just seems to be getting worse. So how should you respond to these fits?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Your boyfriend sounds like he has some impulse control issues and some anger issues. To wake you at 3 a.m. over missing toilet paper in the guest bathroom sounds like there’s something else going on besides missing toilet paper. His behavior sounds so bizarre that I’m not sure you can reason with him.

The question becomes should you stay and accept his behavior as eccentric or should you go and face your own financial demons?

If you stay, he’s probably not going to change, and while some women love so much about their men that they overlook other problems, I’m not sure you’re going to be able to overlook his tantrums — especially when they’re interrupting your sleep and your next day activities.

If you can move out, you don’t have to live at the same standard you have now. In fact, downsizing is the new black, and everyone is doing it. Taking a roommate, or living with a relative until you can get on your feet financially are both viable options that you may consider.

From what you’ve written, it doesn’t sound like he’s the love of your life, or that he’s got many other assets than paying the bills. So, for that reason, I’m advising you to move out, move on, and get some sleep! 🙂

[Avril Mae]

I think your boyfriend has anger issues. That’s not normal to be furious because of some toilet paper. Don’t tolerate that kind of attitude towards you. If possible, try to find a job and prove him that you’ll be able to leave him if he don’t that kind of action.

[Member]

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